Lulu Back To Pester Take That Like It’s 1993

She’s small. She’s Scottish. And she’s coming soon to an enormodrome near you. That’s right, Lulu has joined Take That’s ‘Keep Howard In Designer Beanies For Another Decade Tour 2006’.

Lulu told the Daily Record that “the band must have thought ‘we need that old bag Lulu on tour,’” and that she’d accepted their offer with smiley showbiz glee.

Lulu, who has recently been anointed a National Treasure, sang with Take That on their 1993 number one single Relight My Fire. Such was the impact of her fourteen-second contribution to the song (plus ad-libs!) that Lulu remarks, "I don’t really know how they could have done that track [live] without me."

So, ‘spray lovers, what can you expect from Lulu’s appearances
with Take That (CDs) in aircraft hangars next April? As wee Lulu herself says,
“nothing has been set in stone”, but here at hecklerspray towers we can
speculate with the best of them! Here’s what our team of experts
envisages:

Lulu opens the show with the raspy “Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell” that
launched her career back in 1964 and has pretty much sustained it ever
since.

Lulu sings That One She Did With Bowie. It’s called The Man Who Sold
The World, trivia fans! The kids young mums waiting for Take That are
baffled but a few older gentlemen - They must be with their children.
How sweet! Ah, but why are they holding hands? - seem to enjoy it so she
gets away with it.

Lulu trots down an oversized walkway from the stage to the middle of
the arena to join, as they say, the fans. Everyone gasps and exclaims
“Heavens, in the name of Anna Ford doesn’t she look young!” Inducing
this response has of course been Lulu’s raison d’être for the last
decade.

Lulu ends her set with a rousing version of That One She Did With Ronan
Keating. Ronan doesn’t join her, of course. Good god no! That would be
like Macca supporting a Stones gig. The kids young mums love it and the
pop pixie bids her adieu to rapturous applause. She bellows “have a
great night guys, see you soon!” to the crowd but gives a cheeky wink
to suggest that she might be back sooner than they think. (!!!!).

An hour or so later, about two minutes and thirty-seven seconds into
Relight My Fire, Lulu returns to the stage! She walks down a giant
staircase dressed as a red devil and the crowd just loses it. She even
flicks her devil’s whip at Jason Orange a bit while reeling off those
famous ad-libs! This is cheeky because she might have… well some people
say… err it’s rumoured that she once mounted him and rode him like he
was Red Rum and she was racing in the Grand National of 1973.

You think you’ve got a lot of Lulu stuff? Take a look at all the Lulu memorabilia on eBay

Read more:

Lulu to join Take That tour - Entertainmentwise

[story by Nick Levine]