Love Island Betting Odds: Alicia Gone, Top Girl Betting

OK, so we know we wanted Love Island to get interesting, but we were sort of hoping it'd become interesting in a way that didn't have us pulling our hair with frustration at the gigantic stupidity of the contestants.

If you didn't see Love Island on Friday - and the latest viewing figures suggest that you probably didn't - this is more or less what happened. The public voted for who they wanted to leave, and a shortlist of the three Love Island contestants with the most votes was drawn up. On the shortlist was Alicia Douvall, who decided that - rather than stick it out and see who the contestants wanted to vote off Love Island - got her mangled face into a right old cob and ran off in tears, literally never to be seen again. Then, when the time came for the other Love Island contestants to vote for who they wanted to leave - even though Alicia had already left - most of them refused to vote. Even though that's part of the job they were paid tens of thousands of pounds to do. The flaky braindead goons. But, hey, at least Danan's back. And Steve O, too! Blimey!

Now, so long as a) the Love Island contestants learn the rules and b) ITV bigwigs don't realise what an embarrassing car crash they have on their hands and axe the show, one male and one female Love Island contestant have to win. But who? Here's this week's Love Island betting odds for the winning girl, with betting odds from PaddyPower.com…

Lady Victoria Hervey - Usually at this point, we'd list a bunch of reasons why Lady Victoria Hervey should leave Love Island, preferably from a cannon straight into a shark's mouth - reasons like her moronic voice, her stupid giraffey face, the way she is actually unable to point at the country she lives at on a map etc - but we won't. On Friday, Lady Victoria Hervey was one of the only Love Island contestants who figured out that they were meant to eliminate someone without throwing a giant spazzy fit. But will Lady Victoria Hervey win Love Island? Not a chance, buddy - she's still about as appealing as spending a night in a sleeping bag full of your Nan's piss. Current Love Island betting odds - 16/1

Colleen Shannon - The Nikki Ziering clause states that Colleen Shannon can't win Love Island because she talks all foreign and that, but we're not so sure. Colleen is the Imogen of Love Island; she's dull but she's pretty. And, what's more, all the boys seem to fancy her, so there might be a testosterone-fuelled Love Island headbutt battle over her before long. Having said that, of course Colleen won't win Love Island - after all, how long could male viewers possibly stay interested in a jiggly pair of breasts? Ahem. Current Love Island betting odds - 5/1

Sophie Anderton - Sophie Anderton exists as an example of the very worst in female behaviour; wanting what they can't have. Most people would rather eat teeth than spend a couple of days in a suite with the crap one out of Boyzone, and that includes Sophie Anderton. But then, just because his new-found Christian beliefs meant that he opted to sleep on the Love Shack sofa instead of sharing a bed with her, Sophie has decided to pursue Shayne Lynch like a mental antelope on heat. He's the crap one out of Boyzone, you flipping idiot! Current Love Island betting odds - 7/2

Kellee Bryan - Kellee is a possible contender to win Love Island, because people actually know who she is. That's more than any of the others: even most of the contestants' parents, if they were shown a picture of their kids, would probably just shrug and ask if they were in an episode of Holby City once in 2002. But Kellee was kind of famous for about a month 13 years ago, and that will work in her favour. But it's not all smooth sailing for Kellee, since she's roughly as interesting as an afternoon spent categorising paperclips. Current Love Island betting odds - 7/4

Bianca Gascoigne - Love Island line of the week came when Bianca Gascoigne - a kind of illegally-pirated copy of Jordan - refused to nominate anyone on Friday, since "It’s not in my nature." So it's not in your nature to play a game by the rules without kicking up a needless fuss because you have to write a name on a piece of paper once a week while spending six weeks on a tropical island and earning £30,000 for the pleasure? You daft twat. Still, Bianca's the favourite to win Love Island, inexplicably. Current Love Island betting odds - 7/4

Tomorrow - more Love Island betting odds! But until then, don't
forget to check out the latest Love Island betting odds, from any
number of these brilliant betting websites. Good luck!

Hecklerspray recommends: 

Free £10 bet at PaddyPower

Free £25 bet at SportingOdds.com

Free bets or £100 cashback at SportingIndex

[story by Stuart Heritage]