This weekend saw Liz Hurley get married to her boyfriend Arun Nayur, which isn’t really news; but now Liz Hurley and Arun Nayur have gone to India for six days of traditional Indian ceremonies which, er, isn’t really news either come to think of it.

Oh, who are we kidding? When the world’s worst actress gets married to some rich bloke we’ve never heard of, of course it’s news. Globe-crushing news. Anyway, now that Liz Hurley and Arun Nayur have finally got married to each other, the traditional Indian ceremonies can now commence, including the traditional – some would say poignant – moment where the groom’s mother turns to her husband and says “Did you see her in Mad Dogs And Englishmen? I didn’t care much for that film, you know. And she should have been arrested for doing that to Bedazzled, the hoity-toity bell-end.”