A mother’s love is unconditional and eternal, and often gives female newspaper columnists the right to use the prefix “as a mother…” to justify wanting to do terrible things to all kinds of people. Lindsay Lohan’s mother is no different, you know.

Old Ma Lohan, who sometimes goes by the name Dina, has got wind of the nasty letter that the producer of Lindsay Lohan’s new movie wrote her daughter after she had the temerity to cost the production hundreds of thousands of dollars by possibly partying just a little too much and ending up in hospital. And proving that there’s nothing in the world as scary as an overprotective mother, Old Ma Lohan has called the letter “ridiculous.”