Lindsay Lohan Gets Tattoo That Shows A Lovely Lack Of Self-Awareness

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Lindsay Lohan wants you to know that she’s a moron. That’s the only possible reason why she emerged from a tattoo parlour this week permanently marked with the phrase: Live Without Regrets.

The starlet drunken car crash is said to have told pals that she’s ‘at a great point in her life and wanted to do something she’d always remember’.

Who wouldn’t want to remember the first second third time they got their vag out for the public? At least this time it was sponsored by Playboy and not 12 Jagerbombs and an hour in the powder rooms

And while there’s talk that she could be playing Liz Taylor in a flick (a mental harridan portraying an older, equally dead-eyed lunatic), her work shouldn’t ever be considered as inspiration for a tattoo.

Other possible highlight from 2011 that Lindsay might want to commemorate:

  • Racking up $1.4m in legal fees
  • Losing $10,000 cash at a house party
  • Being photographed French-kissing her own mother
  • Having her dad tell everyone that she’s ‘either smoking crack or meth’
  • Being sentenced to 30 days in jail
  • Getting fitted with a new set of teeth to make her look less of a meth-head
  • Spending over $90,000 on limos
  • Being accused of having an affair with married man Vikram Chatwal
  • Threatening to sue Pitbull, Dania Ramez and Mena Suvari,
  • Being caught shoplifting a necklace
  • Getting sued for assault and battery

To be fair, we only went as far back as far as July 2011 before we got bored of thinking of reasons why 2011 was ‘a great point of her life’.

It’s entirely possible that she saved some nuns, puppies and orphans from a house fire previous to this.

Lindsay darling, when most people are at a point in their lives they want to remember, they take a Polaroid. They don’t sketch the phrase on their hands like that vigilante from Memento.

There’s nothing good about this tattoo – the hand writing looks like it was scrawled by a drunken crack w- oh, oh wait, we get it now.

This was a guest post by Lady Robotnik and, most likely, she’s gonna kick you into a coma.

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Comments

  1. says

    I like the list format a lot. Perhaps you should apply this to more celebrities? ‘Why 2011 was a great year for Miley Cyrus/Jordan/Michael Jackson etc etc’

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