As a recovering addict, Lindsay Lohan knows that the moment even an atom of booze passes her lips she'll fill her trousers with cocaine and go and crash her car somewhere stupid.
But still, that threat alone hasn't stopped Lindsay Lohan from impinging on her Year Of Sex, because it's been reported that Lindsay Lohan recently went out, rubbed herself up and down two different men, chugged a bunch of cocktails and then had a fight with some photographers.
Yeah yeah, allegedly. Jeez.
To be honest with you, we're a little bit disappointed with the way that Lindsay Lohan's Year Of Sex is panning out. Her brief was pretty well-defined – Lindsay just had to get over her addictions to booze and drugs by boffing every single man she came across. And, although Lindsay Lohan started well – single-handedly annexing the island of Capri with her vagina in a day – lately it seems to have gone a little dry.
Either that or Lindsay Lohan has learnt not to spray her ladymusk around in public. But where's the fun in that?
Sensing our unease at events, though, Lindsay Lohan is back on track and making up for lost time, if reports are to be believed. Apparently on Friday Lindsay Lohan turned up to the Beatrice Inn in New York with reality TV gonk Brody Jenner and ex-boyfriend Stavros Niarchos, the man who's primarily famous for crashing Paris Hilton's car.
That in itself is fine – after all, this is Lindsay Lohan's Year Of Sex and we should be encouraging her to do it with as many men as she can – but then Lindsay Lohan had a couple of drinks and all hell broke loose. The New York Daily News reports:
"Lindsay is learning how to work through her addictions and, once in a while, she chooses to have a cocktail," says a friend, attempting to explain. "People overexaggerate her behavior when in fact on Friday night, many people commented to her on how composed she was." One source contends that drinks were showing on Linds on Friday. Confronted by paparazzi at the Beatrice, "she started going berserk," claims a witness. "She didn't want them taking shots of her with Brody."
And this is how it begins. First Lindsay Lohan takes a cheeky swig from a bottle of champagne, then she has a couple of cocktails in a bar and gets a bit fighty, then the next thing you know she's trying to cram as many illegal drugs into her trousers as she can and crashing her her. And then, who knows? Lindsay Lohan could wind up in rehab again… or worse.
She could make I Know Who Killed Me 2. Or, you know, she could die or something.
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