Lily Allen and Lady Sovereign have a lot to disagree on at the best of times – who can happyslap a pensioner the fastest, who can sell the cheapest knock-off Burberry baseball caps, that sort of thing – but arguing over musical quality? Really?
Apparently Lady Sovereign – you know her, she's the UK hip-hop A Flock Of Seagulls – has been laying into loudmouth cod-reggae popstar Lily Allen because Lily Allen has got a famous dad and Lady Sovereign hasn't. And now in an astonishing return-salvo Lily Allen has responded furiously to Lady Sovereign's outburst, hitting back via her MySpace blog.
And to make matters worse we're reporting it as news. And we're sorry.
Everyone knows who Lily Allen is – she's the gobby, funny-looking pint-sized poppet who couldn't win a Brit so save her life who'll be your girlfriend for the right price. Lily Allen is primarily famous for three things: 1) Being an unabashed pop singer who swears occasionally, allowing the NME and some toddlers to like her in equal measure, 2) Being rude about other singers on the internet and 3) Having a dad who got his cock out in Shallow Grave.
Meanwhile Lady Sovereign is less well-known. She's a gobby, funny-looking pint-sized pikey rapper who somehow got signed by Jay-Z and is apparently the most famous white female British rapper ever, pushing Su Pollard into second place after an unprecedented run at the top. But for all of American love, Lady Sovereign is only known in England as the novelty act who rapped on the song by the tit who walked off Never Mind The Buzzcocks. So we have two gobby female musicians of restricted height – Lily Allen (famous in Britain, wants to be famous in America) and Lady Sovereign (famous in America, wants to be famous in Britain). There's trouble brewing and Sky, as ever, has its finger on the pulse:
Sov claimed Lily is only successful because her dad is comedian Keith Allen. She spat: "I'm not hating on her but someone like Lily Allen, just cause her dad's famous, doesn't have to work as hard as someone like me." Well, that really got Lily's goat… And we don't mean to take sides – but we do applaud Lily's clever comeback. She wrote on her MySpace page: "In response to Miss Sovereign's comments, I've spoken to my dad and he says he'd be happy to adopt you if you think it will give you a leg up."
Hey, this is like the Blur vs Oasis of chavvy midgets who not many people particularly care about. Lily Allen has made her reputation by slagging off other singers on her MySpace page; lately Lily called Corinne Bailey Rae "boring" – a shocking observation right up there with calling the sky "blue" or her own music "overplayed." And Lady Sovereign has her ghetto Asbo-cred to uphold, too, so none of this is especially shocking. In fact, it almost seems as if this whole feud thing has been carefully choreographed to help raise each other's profile in Britain and/or America.
There's only one way to prove that Lily Allen and Lady Sovereign mean it, and that's with a bottle-fight in Wetherspoons carpark at sundown. Be there. Or don't be there. We're not especially fussed either way, to be honest.
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Bellyache says
If it goes to violence, Sov’s gotta win. She’s got some heft behind her, and lili used to have Harry Enfield as a pretend dad when Keith walked out ffs
Stefie says
Both of ’em annoying talentless bitches can kiss my as for all I care.
lily allen says
i think lady soverien is the best
ya mum says
sovs gud but least lily can sing, THATS y she is succesful
They shud work 2 getha sovs lyrics & lilys voice tht wud b gud
Lilys comeback was gud tho u gotta admit lmao
Charlene says
Actually lady sovereign wrote 9 to 5 n the ordinary boys redid it ( just thought u’d like to know), n you can’t compare those two, lilys a singer sovs a rapper two different animals…anyway sov would win hands down :)
LOVEE THE SOVEE says
OKAYY LETS FACE IT…WHO GETS MORE HATE???…LADY SOVEREIGN.. YOU GOTTA ADMIT!!! BUT I THINK SHES GREAT!! SHES FUNNY A JOKER AND A MIDGET SHES DIFFERENT!! AND UNIQUE!…JAY Z LOVES HER MUSIC AND THE SOV THANKS HIM AND EMAILS HIM NOW AND AGAIN HE CALLS HER THE MIGHTY MOUSE! AND THERE MUSIC MATES! ..BUT WHEN MARY J BLIGE SED SHE LIKE LILLY ALLENS WORK..LILLY ALLEN JUST SAID..SHE DID CARE. UNGRATEFULL. AND ALSO I DO LIKE LILLY ALLEN! BUT ITS TRUE HER FATHER GAVE HER FAME! AND LADY SOV GOT REJECTED BY SOO MANY PEOPLE UNTILL FINALLY SHE GOT A CONTRACT << THATS F***ING FIGHTING!! LISTEN TO LADY SOVEREIGNS SONG BLAH BLAH AND LOVE ME OR HATE ME FOR ALL THOSE HATERS!!!!!!!!
kevin says
If you read up on Lily Allen, just a little more, you’ll find out that what her father did for her, was get an appointment, with Warner Brothers, in London, and that fell through. Lily Allen has been on her own ever since, theres no entourage, she does not have people that control press release, (boy thats obvious)you know that old cracker, started her own web page, downloads, little gigs at rough trade record store,(thats on video)and two years on the road, non-stop, she did not make a dime off of Alright Still, but she wrote all of those lyrics,(good lyrics) Knock em out is a good song, so is littlest things. Theres more good songs like, I could say, or who’d of known (its titled that way to get your attention)Theres a lot of myth about Lily Allen, because it’s printed in the paper. Give yourselves credit for not believing what you read in the press. thank you.
Tiffany says
Lady Sovereign is obviously the best!! What a sad-ass report, btw.
Maddy says
Imma fan of both, though Sov is waaaaay better than Lily. Stupid effin haters. If you don’t care bout Sov/think she’s nobody, then why even talk about her. You ain’t go nothing on her and she’s not a goopy pintsized whatever (or whatever excuse of a diss ya came up with) She’s THE BIGGEST MIDGET IN THE GAME. B.T.W love Lily but if they had a fight Lil’s kicks wouldn’t hurt Sov even if lily was wearin stillettos. MAKE WAY FOR THE S O VEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gemma Riley says
Lady Sov’s pretty good. She gets stereotyped because of the way her voice sounds and how she dresses but she’s very witty. I quite like Lily Allen aswell. Lady Sov probably shouldn’t have mentioned about Lily Allen’s father because A.) A lot of people know about Keith Allen because of Lily Allen – he really wasn’t that famous, B.) Even though she didn’t mean it in a slag off Lily way, Lily would obviously take it that way, she does seem to take things too personally.
I was going to make the point about 9 to 5 being Lady Sovereign’s own song before The Ordinary Boys remixed it but I looked up and Charlene’s already done that.