We’ve got our fair share of admirers here at hecklerspray. The fans of Harry Potter, Pink Floyd, Bulgaria, Jesus. Predominately though, these guys can spell, they understand the difference between ‘your’ and ‘you’re’ and most of them are even coherent. Most.
Spare a thought then for Lee Ryan. Lee – or at least someone claiming to be Lee Ryan writing from Lee Ryan's official MySpace page – got so upset over what Chris Laverty scribbled about him in two none-too-recent articles back when Lee Ryan was even halfway famous that yesterday he decided to send us the following message. Seriously, this came from the Lee Ryan's official MySpace page, so there's a very good chance that the message came from the man, the myth, the kid in special school who used his textbooks as toilet paper. If we’ve not said this before, it is now abundantly clear that Lee writes all his own songs. Every single one of them. Here Lee goes (reproduced verbatim):
'hi there i read what you wrote about me and i just wanted to say you look like the jealous type have you ever pulled a woman, or is it in your nature that so obviously drives you to be so bitchy about other blokes!! trust me i feel flattered but im not that way inclined…..sorry.
i hope oneday you are recognised as a true arse hole journalist for at this moment in time your just an arse hole but keep writing shit about me it only makes me more famous and you look more pathetic!! respectfully your a cunt.
Lee Ryan'
Lee there, turning straight men gay the world over. Though by his own admission (and a mischievous dropping of the word 'a') he is such a delightfully 'respectful cunt' himself. Of course that ‘arse hole’ (that’s a hole in the arse) Chris Laverty is too upset to comment in any great detail. Besides which, the second week in every month is when he goes hunting for Lee Ryan records to cuddle up to at night. Hasn’t found any yet though.
Poundland, Boyes, Cash Converters… must keep looking.
Eben says
Ha! This is great.
Viking Lumberjack says
What? That is… uh… why the… erm……….. uh…. wait, what?
For once I’m at a lack of words (although this sentence disproves that). For some strange reason I feel compelled to comment on this, but what insult could I possibly spew that would make him look like more of a vapid moron than he already did himself?
Lee Ryan has beat me. LEE FUCKING RYAN HAS BEAT ME, AND HE WASN’T EVEN TRYING!
Tears are nearly welling up in my eyes. This may well be the first time that anyone has been able to fully shut down my ability to insult. His own comment painted him as such a thorough mental patient that for once I have nothing left to add. It’s so ironic that he defeated himself that I feel sick.
The only hope left is that this was an imposter randomly mashing keys with bratwurst sized grubby fingers. I’m going to go quietly lay in the corner of the room in the fetal position now.
Internet Pedant says
What depths he has plummeted to. Imagine calling another human being a… journalist. Still, at least he left Caps Lock off, eh?
kate says
who is he?
Mithaearon says
Wow I was shocked that he could even write, I mean going by his “songs”….
Ant says
Why is everyone always hatin on Lee ???
Journalists are C**** .
I think Doug Is Right “Get a Real Job” I bet there’ll be a million comments after this saying “Clearly your a 15 year old Girl blah blah” Im a 26 year old man !!!
You clearly are the Jealous Type either that or Lees Biggest fan. Its sad that the Only stories you can find are ones about celebs you “Claim” to hate
You’ve sure got a face for radio too Chris Laverty
JBollocks says
Well, allow me to be a little lewd…
It’s true Chris Laverty has never pulled a women, they don’t have the required bits to pull. Boom Boom!
Ok, so I’m channeling Basil Brush.
It gets lonely down here on the edge of nothing.
42degrees south and sinking…
Schmoo says
“Though by his own admission (and a mischievous dropping of the word ‘a’) he is such a delightfully ‘respectful cunt’ himself.”
Not quite. ‘A’ is right next to ‘S’ on the keyboard, and you really don’t have to be an illerate tosspot to forget a comma here and there. I think it would be very gracious of you to edit his typos (obviously caused by a single figure IQ and therefore perfectly understandable) to their intended form: “Respectfully yours, a cunt.”.
Respectfully yours, A. N. Other.
PS: JBollocks, you’re obviously not looking in the right places.
lee ryan says
that message was old where’s the new stuff i wrote? I love that you lot are so hating on me!! haha. it’s really funny. I dont know why i even bother but it does make me laugh. by the way i am dyslexic. but i have got one good voice!! and im good looking!!!
paparatzzi anonymous says
Chris Laverty !!!!!!!!!!!!! He’s the geezer that iwas overheard saying Lee Ryan was GAY!.
It was rumoured that he was intimate with a Scottish Actor Robert Fitchet.
Its amazing the secrets celebs allegedly have and you hear a lot of gossip whilst standing around for hours waiting for that lucky picture to make your money.
I tried to uncover the truth behind this story starting in Scotland.I met the Actor who was extremely alarmed by this rumour and cannot find any evidence to say they are an item.
I must admit such a picture of this pair wouldn’t be frontpage material these days.
Its a bit unfair to make fun of someone with spelling difficulty and sexual preference but as a parasite of the media i am no better chasing smut sleaze and gossip but we all have to make a living
Miss Cracker. says
To VikingLumberjack, it’s foetal, not fetal.. :)
..and Robert Fitchet is a homosexual obsessed Lee Ryan fan who likes sharing his warped fantasies with 15 year old fans, even though he claims his sexuality is inarguably straight..I know this as I have seen evidence of this.
Thirdly, don’t you “journalists”/gossip columnists realise that one can clearly read between the lines here…that this particular attempt at a ‘verbal bashing’ mimics what is potentially seen to be a homosexual infatuation in disguise?
Adam Gade says
That’s a negative, Miss Cracker. Viking is (I assume) American and his spelling is immaculate for the dialect.
paparatzzi anonymous says
Yet Another Negative Miss Cracker.
Robert Fitchet was a victim of a malice horrible woman.
This matter came to my attention whilst working at The Edinburgh Fringe Festival up in Scotland.I was made aware of a Court case involving this subject by a fellow photographer and decided to dig into it as we do.Robert Fitchet was a victim of an obsessed woman.She tendered a guilty plea in a Court and was fined a total of £3000 for acts of malice intent and defamation of character amongst many many other charges.He agreed to an interview despite his team of legal eagles advice not to comment. From what was said in Court he rejected all of her advances and a friendly relationship turned volatile and brutal.She then tormented and violated his personal life she was a priviliged employee and admittedly pled guilty of knowing full well that he only had admiration for Lee Ryan on a professional basis relating to dyslexia began one the most cruel crimes.He told me that he had only admiration for Lee Ryan on the basis of achievement and what he had become despite his dyslexia nothing else and strongly denied any involvement with Lee Ryan.He supports the work of dyslexic organisations and feels strongly about people being verbally bashed as a result of having dyslexia.It would appear on reading his replys and articles that he took this as some joke at the start and he only in his words defends Lee Ryan like everyone else and that ended under great stress with this person. He is an Actor and has a career and i doubt he wanted this type of publicity.I felt you a tad cruel Miss Cracker in your response clearly attacking his motive and sexuality finishing with a carefull ? Clever! (i’m laughing).This woman knew this type of conduct would damage him and set about destroying him. He was chasing off and in full denial of all angles of this matter to protect his reputation and again in his words it was dead and buried until if my memory serves correct some other journalist probed the subject then apologised.He would without no doubt be hated by many female fans of all age groups and i believe he simply thought his strong denial of this matter would put an end to it.I believe that he would have been so traumatised by this hatred displayed by this person that he became suspicious of every blog written and simply attacked every bit of criticism under great pressure of what would drive anyone straight/gay to an emotional state of complete meltdown.You have to remember that he was unaware of who was doing this until this woman was caught and his only crime was denial .He then made people aware of this matter and he was still gunned down.He should have ignored the matter but that is so easy to say when your not in that situation.Can you imagine what it must feel like to be in that position.He is not a homosexual .This woman went on in Court to admit her guilt and offer an explanation that she had strong feelings for him and that she learned he was having an affair with another woman despite being married.She could not come to terms with the fact that his chosen woman was not her.She then set upon her mission to destroy him and the fact he responded to it gave her a taster of the power of destruction.He responded to a lose lose situation being a papparatzzi photographer come journalist i can read between the lines.Blogs are often great study subjects .Its all down to the opinion of the reader and how quickly they respond and in what frame of mind they are in when they reply and in this geezers case he was obviously very traumatised by these events.Im amazed at the feedback on here its always interesting to study the human “opinion ” .
Hidden. says
paparatzzi anonymous: You seem to know alot about this ‘case’ (or ‘fictional story’ as I would call it) Could it be that perhaps you are now … Um how shall I put this? … ‘personally involved’ with Robert, or are you him in disguise because I have had a ‘debate’ with him before and I know that he likes to write essays that are full of sh*t.
Could I possible be this person you refer to in: “it was dead and buried until if my memory serves correct some other journalist probed the subject then apologised.”??? Because as I remember where Robert and I had this argument he said the words ‘dead and buried’ and also went “OMG look everyone she is another journalist trying to get a story!!!” When he found out that I am STUDYING to be one.
Suspicious indeed.
papparatzzi anonymous says
REPLY TO Hidden !
If you would be so kind as to read again i qoute (in his words) in parts of my blog which i got a bit into sorry (laughing).
I am in know way connected to this geezer.
I just feel that he had a bad wrong his way with this diluded woman who set out to ruin him.
I note he apologised to you in the blog in question yet your on here diss’n the geezer again!
I only muscled in on the interview with a fellow reporter who was digging the story at the Court
It was true! He was wronged by this woman and it was when she revealed he had a woman
on the side i realised she was diluded.First she brands him a raging homosexual then a gigilo.
I have been in this pap’n game long enough to know a homosexual out and proud or in the closet
and ive seen this geezer out and about at many gigs and he is not gay homosexual in my opinion.
The geezer got well fired up at the very fact you were a journalist being under great pressure at that time.
You gave your opinion he gave his answer.Its as i say down to opinion but the geezers telling the truth it
was all cleared up in Court.That about wraps this blog up for me.Its old old old news but it passes the time when boredom sets in(laughing)
papparatzzi anonymous says
(laughing) Correction I am in know way connected to this geezer. DELIBERATE!!!!!!!!!
This may take the heat from Lee Ryan’s Dyslexia Dropping the C word (laughing)
or poor keyboard skills just like mine (i type too fast) hey its all a big laugh anyway
(laughing & laughing) oooooops a blooper
Hidden. says
papparatzzi anonymous: Did you see the argument I had with Robert by any chance?
Miss Cracker. says
papparatzzi anonymous, are you saying the woman obsessed with robert fitchet defamed him by branding him such names? if this was in public only then would it warrant a court case. Also, were these allegations pertaining to Lee Ryan? Because I don’t really see the relevance of him in the “court case” that you afore mentioned.
I don’t believe my comments were cruel. I was merely posing a question of whether the “writer” was aware that his agenda for writing might be misinterpreted by the majority of readers that this website attracts. A decent journalist always conceals his motives, but as you said, it’s good to see analyse people’s opinions and note the feedback offered!
Bex says
Agrees 100% with Lee.
Feels sorry for people who have nothing better to do with their life than bitch about people who have achieved so much more than them.
One word, jealousy