First of all, I would like to say that I am still not 100% on board with this whole “Every Kardashian/Jenner sister with a fake ass is pregnant” story. And for that reason, even I’M speculative of the shit I post about these hoes’ pregnancies, because I suspect these pregnancies are as real as their noses, but anyway…
Kylie 4.0 has been almost entirely out of the spotlight since news broke that she was knocked up by Travis Scott and even her social media has been a lot of throwbacks and ad pics that were taken ages ago. Us Weekly is reporting that this is because she don’t want people to see her changing body. LOL, girl, we’ve already seen that body change like four times.
Even though Kylie has completely changed her face and body in front of our very eyes like four times in the past three years, “Maternity Chic” Kylie is apparently not her aesthetic and she doesn’t want us to watch a body evolution that hasn’t been performed by Dr. Miami.
An “insider” *cough*Kris Jenner*cough* reveals:
Kylie prefers to stay home. She feels good but her body is changing. She doesn’t want to be photographed at the moment, she wants more privacy.
I feel where Kylie is coming from, because I do a lot of yoga and take A LOT of pictures of my abs, and, like the Fake Butt Queens of Calabasas, I, too, am with child. Just call me Krysta Kardashian (this was amazingly not planned). As someone who takes a lot of ab pics, it’s hard having your body change and feeling like people are judging your new, baby infested bod. That being said, we ALL fucking know that once that thing (if it really exists) pops out, Kylie is going to pull a Blac Chyna and get her baby daddy to drop $100k on her body bounce back, thus creating Kylie 6.0 (pregnant Kylie is Kylie 5.0. Keep up).
Also, if Kylie really is pregnant and in hiding, Kris Jenner can fuck off with the lies about body insecurity, because I know the real reason that bitch doesn’t want us to see her while she’s pregnant: Pregnant women can’t get lip injections OR facial fillers. Heaven forbid Kylie Jenner starts looking like Kylie Jenner during this whole thing!