We all know that Kim Kardashian’s wedding was a big con. It’s as plain as the nose on her vaguely famous face. Still, we all let America have a moment with it because they wanted their own Tesco Value version of the Royal Wedding and no-one wanted to kill their buzz.
And now, the entire population of the United States of America is dazed and confused, unable to trust, bereft of loving thoughts because Kardashian’s marriage came to an abrupt halt and things seemed fishy. No. Not like that.
With the USA finally cottoning on that the whole thing was a TV induced sham, a man has come forward to underline that point with his Stabilo Boss highlighters. And this man is Jonathan Jaxson, a man who not only has a preposterous surname, but also, used to work as Kim’s publicist. This means he knows exactly what she’s like, right? RIGHT.
Jaxson, who worked with Kardashian (it’s here you’d normally refer to the subject by their job title to refrain from overuse of their name, but alas, we’re still not sure what Kim Kardashian actually does so we’ll just have to break the rules slightly, okay?) from 2007 to 2009 has been dubbed a master of media manipulation.
What a great thing to be able to do! He’s probably manipulating us all right now. Anyway, this master of the dark arts says:
“She knew weeks before getting married she didn’t want to do it”
“She’s never gotten over ex Reggie Bush”
Reggie Bush, of course, is Kimmy’s ex-beau and they used to get up to things like this…
Anyway, while Jaxson was talking with his mouth-hole on the ‘The Elvis Duran Morning Show’, the publicist also revealed that he had “staged” a number of media stunts for Kardashian while she was his client.
“I staged several of the moments that the world has seen of her, such as a ring that we alleged was from Reggie Bush”
“It was December 26, 2007 – I remember the day. She was going to go shopping with her grandmother and her mom and we said, ‘Let’s do something to get more press for you.’ She said, ‘Perfect. Let me go to a ring store and walk out as if Reggie Bush were proposing to me… I have ring I love and adore – it’s seven carats. I’ll keep it in my purse.
“It was calculated to a T and then it was leaked to a magazine”
Who would’ve ever guessed that people in the spotlight would be so vacuous and underhand, eh?