Most people were too busy being hypnotized by her grease butt to actually look into what was actually being said in Kim Kardashian’s Paper magazine interview, and fair enough because it was a grease butt that launched a million amazed gifs and memes. However, if you HAVE looked into the interview then you’ll know it’s full of some real gems.
For one, you will be shocked to find out that the woman who makes me look like I’m not a shallow cunt actually spends two fucking hours EVERY DAY in hair and make-up. I didn’t even spend two hours in hair and make-up on the day of my goddamn wedding (maybe I did, who fucking knows, I was three mimosas deep when the girl who was doing my make-up showed up).
Once you’ve gotten?past her full frontal and ass out pics in Paper, you’ll find that there is a pretty useless interview with Kim Kardashian behind it all. The only somewhat amusing fact in the whole damn thing is Kim’s admission that she spends two hours getting her hair and make-up done every day. Nope, not just for special occasions, she gets her face contoured to death every damn day.
One try I tried to contour my face and I looked like a fucking jackass who was just kind of dirty. I looked more like Lindsay Lohan in court than I did Kim Kardashian, so I get that she needs a professional to do it, but I can’t imagine needing it every fucking day.
Don’t get me wrong, Kim looks absolutely stunning, but who the fuck wouldn’t look stunning if they had a professional hair dresser and a professional make-up artist put them together every single fucking day?! No wonder she takes so many selfies! I take a selfie every time I get the energy to put eye shadow on because that shit makes me feel fancy, Kim Kardashian has her eye make-up put on by a professional every single day which means every day is selfie worthy.
So, people need to calm down about Kim Kardashian’s naked Paper Magazine photoshoot. This is merica, where every woman has the right to get naked and let one gay man cover her with baby oil so another gay man can take photos. What do you think the troops fought for?!? It’s the hair and make-up thing I don’t get. I mean, sure Kim kind of looks like a chick Uncle Fester without make-up, but The Addams Family was an amazing movie! Embrace that shit, girl!