And just so you don’t get confused, the title of this blog does not mean I want to be like “Fuck Pepsi, I’m going to go drink a Coke”, because I already prefer Coca-Cola as a soda. No, the title of this shit means that Kendall Jenner’s new Pepsi ad makes me want to do a ton of cocaine just so I can somewhat cope with the fucking idiocy that occurs on this planet on a daily basis.
Kendall went from my second favourite Kardashian/Jenner sister (all hail Queen Kourtney) to lower than Brody fucking Jenner in under 3 minutes. Bitch isn’t even Spencer Pratt to me right now.
In case you haven’t seen it, I’ll post it below. It was actually half hard to find because even though it just premiered, Pepsi pulled that shit ASAP because of the backlash.
So basically, Kendall Jenner is having some sort of photoshoot, and this super peaceful protest is walking past her and everyone is carrying these like crazy generic signs that aren’t actually saying anything of remote significance, and then this guy who may or may not be Muslim stops and nods to Kendall to join in so she tears off her blonde wig, rubs off her lipstick, joins this lame ass protest of nothing, and prevents police brutality by giving a cop a Pepsi.
I am not fucking joking.
People are pissed for a lot of reasons, like this being a key example of capitalism taking the real plight of the people and repackaging it as marketing to sell back to them for financial gain. Or the fact that it makes light of police brutality, because, hey, did you know everything shitty in the world can be stopped by a drink that’s giving half of us diabetes and supermodels like Kendall Jenner definitely don’t drink anyway?
I’m mostly pissed because for like 30 seconds of my life I thought Kendall Jenner was better than this, but this commercial is horrific. It’s like, Kendall is trying to be woke, but she’s making me wish I was drunk, and I don’t mean that in a good way.
Like, I’m sorry, but unless she put a fuck ton of MDMA in that Pepsi she gave to the cop, there’s like a 90% chance he gets aggressive with that maybe Arab guy who nodded her along into this thing in the first place.
I just can’t. No Kardashian or Jenner is woke. Those bitches don’t even sound woke. Seriously, have you ever noticed how drowsy they all sound? Clearly there is a reason for that.
I mean, Caitlyn is a trans woman and SHE’S not even woke! These women are living in such a bizarre world of white privilege it makes ME sick, and I’m literally a white woman, writing a Masters thesis ABOUT white women, drinking white wine, and watching the goddamn Golden Girls right now! If I think you should check yourself, you’ve clearly got a problem.
Kendall’s real dad, Todd, would have never let her do this.