It's good to see that – despite being over 300 years old and now looking like the melty-face man from Raiders Of The Lost Ark – Keith Richards is still the bad boy of rock and roll.
Sure, Keith Richards is getting on a bit, so we need to scale down our definition of what makes a 'bad boy'. Like falling out of a tree, bumping your noggin and going to hospital for a bit? Yeah, that'll do.
Keith Richards is a living embodiment of rock and roll excess. A life of debauchery has left Keith with lines in his face so deep that he'd have even the sternest-stomached Botox doctor running for cover. And, even though Keith Richards is now mostly made of fossils and crude oil, his rebellious spirit remains.
While his singer Mick Jagger grown into a member of the establishment by getting knighted, starring in his own sitcom and squabbling with US Presidents over hotel rooms, Keith Richards has remained a little more, shall we say, earthy. As his weekend accident testifies.
According to reports, Keith Richards was taking a break from finally breaking China and playing giant Brazilian supergigs by relaxing at an exclusive club resort in Fiji. What is Fiji full of? Palm trees, that's what. And that's what Keith Richards apparently fell out of. Onto his head. Richards was then airlifted to Auckland's Ascot Hospital in New Zealand for observation. But he's gone now, as hospital duty manager Geoff Sparks was only too pleased to tell anyone that would listen:
"I can categorically confirm Mr. Richards … is no longer a patient in this hospital. He has been discharged."
And he seems to have scarpered from New Zealand, too. Anyone would think that Keith Richards was a little bit embarrassed by his mishap, which apparently left him with mild concussion. No New Zealand photographers could get a picture of the rocker during the stay, and it was reported that he hired 27 bodyguards for his hospital floor with four more prowling around his room.
Any embarrassment is completely misjudged, though. Getting smashed on vodka and rum and then falling five metres from a tree onto your head is actually kinda cool. We think that Keith Richards should take any feelings of shame from the accident and direct it straight at any album The Rolling Stones have made since 1986.
[story by Stuart Heritage]