Sometimes I literally have no idea what I’m doing with my life. This is one of those nights, because I just took an ativan and now I’m about to blog about Jamie Foxx and Katie Holmes, two people I don’t know, and how they’re FINALLY allowed to be a couple in public after five fucking years because her weird Scientology contract is up.
What kind of goddamn world are we living in? Anyway, back to Jamie and Katie.
I guess it’s officially safe to say that the Scientology aliens aren’t coming for Katie and that her five-year, no public dating contract with Tom Cruise was legit a real thing, because as soon as that thing expired home girl has been getting all up on Jamie Foxx in public.
Well, as you can see:
These two have been maybe dating for five-ish years now, but still totally refuse to talk about each other. In fact, if you even bring Katie Holmes up during the interview, Jamie Foxx will end the interview then and there. Katie Holmes went from guys jumping on Oprah’s couch screaming he’s in love to guys walking out of interviews at just the mention of her name. She really went zero to sixty on the whole privacy thing, but after what she probably went through with Tom Cruise, I guess I get it.
Typically, when it comes to celebrities, I can usually pepper in some anecdote about my own personal experiences to link it to their stories, but in the case of Katie Holmes I really just can’t. I’ve never dated a guy in a cult who made me sign an agreement to not date anyone for five years in exchange for keeping my kid. I mean, one time I dated a guy who worked at McDonald’s, but I really feel like that’s maybe not comparable?