Kanye West often refers to himself as the son of God – it’s a perfectly acceptable statement for him to make.

No really, it is. If you’ve read the Bible, you’ll remember the passage describing Jesus’s decision to make an album about how miserable he is with loads of Autotune on it. And we believe it was Mark 3:11 that went “And, lo, Jesus was charged with three misdemeanors for acting like a cock in an airport.”

And now Kanye West has been charged with three misdemeanors for that time he acted like a cock in an airport too. Oh, holy symmetry.

If you want to annoy a celebrity, your two best bets are to become either a member of the paparazzi or a large international airport. Both are Kryptonite to the famous. Become a photographer and one day you’ll find yourself being beaten up by Pierce Brosnan in a carpark; become an airport and there’s a strong likelihood you’ll wind up getting covered in David Hasselhoff’s urine.

But if you’re a photographer in an airport, then you’re really asking for trouble. Especially if Kanye West is around. This was ably proved last September thanks to that video of Kanye West apparently grabbing a paparazzo’s camera in a scrum of journalists and smashing it to the ground.

We don’t know exactly what happened prior to the bust-up, but we do know that it’s incredibly difficult to make Kanye West that angry – usually you’d need to not give him an award or be annoyed at the fact that his concert didn’t start for eight hours after it was supposed to. You know, something huge.

But whatever the cause of the incident, Kanye West is now paying the price – he’s just been charged for it. EW reports:

Kanye West has been charged with criminal misdemeanor battery, grand theft, and vandalism by Los Angeles city prosecutors for an incident stemming from an altercation with paparazzi last September. West was arrested at Los Angeles International Airport after allegedly breaking the flash of a photographer’s camera inside a terminal.

Worse still for Kanye West, if he’s convicted of these charges he faces up to two and a half years in jail. That sounds bad at first, until you remember that Kanye West literally thinks he’s Jesus and even Jesus had to spend 40 days and 40 nights in the wilderness. True, Kanye would technically be spending 912 days and 912 nights being violently bummed by a psychologically-disturbed arsonist inside a little room that smells of wee, but Jesus wasn’t allowed to be picky you know.

Besides, regardless of whether or not Kanye West will be convicted, this whole affair is bound to be good for his creativity. After all, who doesn’t want to hear a concept triple-album all about how angry Kanye West got when he realised that the ink used to take his fingerprints hadn’t been heated to his specified level of comfort? That would be golden.

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