You know how Jennifer Aniston has been DEFINITELY PREGNANT like, a million times?? And every time bitch walks around in a bikini to show off her toned tummy as a big ol middle finger to everyone? Well, it’s been a similar situation for Jessica Biel and Justin Timberlake, though on a smaller scale.? There have been rumors multiple times that Biel was about to add some curves to her boyish figure, but each time they have proven to be untrue.
This time around, however, there have been a few people who have slipped up by opening their big mouths and basically have confirmed that there is truth to the rumors now.? I believe nothing until Lance Bass or Joey Fatone Instagrams a congratulations in the form of an N’SYNC meme.
I personally have never gotten the Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel thing.? They just seem so awkward together, and I still question whether or not Biel is even into dudes.? Obviously, everything I know about them is purely from gossip sites and their comments sections, but I am a professional here so my judgments are pretty much guaranteed to be on point.?? I admit though that I still have a small candle of hope burning in my soul that Justin and Britney will reunite one day, so to be honest I don’t think I’d really like any woman he’s with if it isn’t her.? If matching denim outfits aren’t the sure tell sign of true love, then I don’t know what is.
But since Timberlake hates soulmates, he married Biel a couple of years ago.? She wore a Macy’s discount prom section approved dress, he didn’t invite most of N’SYNC, it was all in all a relatively meh event.? Since then, every few months it seemed a rumor would pop up that Jessica was knocked up.? And every time, the two would either deny it or ignore it, and Jessica would “happen” to be photographed with her flat as a board midriff showing.
Lately though, the rumors have been STRONG that the pregnancy was a legitimate thing this time.???Last week,?the Editor-in-Chief of Instyle magazine, Ariel Foxman, posted a throwback photograph of himself and Biel at the red carpet premier of Total Recall with this caption.
Within a very short time of it appearing, Foxman took it down.? Presumably this is because Timberlake threatened to sick Biel and her man arms on his face if he didn’t immediately remove his foot from his mouth.?? Since then, multiple “anonymous sources” have come out to say that yes, Justin Timberlake put his dick in Biel’s box and made a baby.? One supposed credible source went to Us and gave them this nugget of confirmation:
?Right now they are just enjoying the news for themselves. They just want a happy baby.”
Neither Biel nor Timberlake, or their reps, have come out to confirm or deny anything, but I have a sneaky feeling this time is legitimate.? Which means next year?we may see pictures?emerge of Justin Timberlake carrying a newborn baby in an Ergo carrier, and in turn some serous meme competition for Ryan Gosling.
You know,?2014 was definitely the year of the Hot Ryan Dads.? Maybe 2015 will belong to Justins?? You know what that means- more rumors for Jennifer Aniston!? Come on, Justin Theroux!? You can’t let Timberlake have the title all to himself.