Ah, Valentine's Day weekend. What could be more romantic than dragging your girlfriend to see a hokey sci-fi movie on the off-chance that you'll get to see Rachel Bilson in her bra.
You guessed it – Jumper is the top movie at the weekend box office.
Jumper, you'll remember, is the film where Hayden Christensen can jump through space in an instant. We're looking forward to when he learns to jump through time, because maybe we can convince him to undo the Star Wars prequels. And Factory Girl. And Awake. And maybe, if we're lucky, the moment he decided to be an actor instead of a Superdrug shelf-stacker.
Jumper – this week's number one US weekend box office movie – has all the ingredients of a summer blockbuster. Special effects, flash-bang trailers, Rachel Bilson in a bra – these are all indicators that Jumper should have been released when the kids are on school holiday. But it's been released in February instead. Why is that?
Because Jumper looks shit, obviously. But let's not run its achievements down – Jumper is still top of the weekend box office. And that's something to be proud of, especially when a trailer featuring the phrase 'From the director of Mr & Mrs Smith' should have cinemagoers clattering into each other in a race to get to the exit. Here's this week's US weekend box office top five:
1 – Jumper (Now the debate can begin – would Jumper be any better if Eminem had starred in it? We'd like to think it would and, if fortune smiled on the production, it may have even been a tenth as good as Snoop Dogg's Hood Of Horror) $27,225,000
2 – Step Up 2 The Streets (Do you like movies about dancing? About young people battling to express themselves? With numbers in the title where words should be? No, us neither. Something tells us we should all avoid this one, then) $19,666,000
3 – The Spiderwick Chronicles (Jumanji, basically. But without Robin Williams. So better) $19,080,000
4 – Fool's Gold (Fool's Gold lost almost 40% of its audience in a week, meaning that perhaps braindead romantic comedies about two unlikable people with zero chemistry aren't the box office juggernauts that everyone expected) $13,080,000
5 – Definitely, Maybe (Fools Gold? Definitely, Maybe? What's with all these romantic comedies taking their names from 1990s British guitar bands? We swear to God, if Hugh Grant pops up in the next few months with a film inspired by the artistic merit of Shed Seven, we're going to throw ourselves off a bridge) $12,804,000
Read more:
patrick says
The filming style of Jumper made me feel like i myself was jumping around… very cool. Christensen’s lines were as short as possible as well, which made his performance as good as it could be.