In an effort to refute the ever-increasing rumors that he’s gay, Joseph Gordon-Levitt is appearing on the October cover of Out, aka That Super Gay Magazine, and addressing the gossip in the most annoying way possible — by classily side-stepping it.
“That would be really tacky. The media would win if I had to clarify.”
But what about all the women who want to have a relationship with your penis, Joseph?? It’s not fair to us — I mean them — to keep us — them — in the dark about your sexual preferences. Just free us — no, them — of this overbearing lust if you’re gay. We — THEY — will happily still love you and go to all your movies and use you as an example for how our boyfriends should dress and do their hair.In all fairness, even if he went on record saying he’s straight people wouldn’t believe him. Obviously there are the fangirls who really really want it to be true, but his hetero-relationship history isn’t exactly extensive.
He dated Alex Mack/that girl from 10 Things I Hate About You, but something about her just screams “beard”. That was like 10 years ago, so there’s a chance he was still trying to like girls and awkwardly feeling her up over her t-shirts with kittens on it, but you know he was thinking about Leonardo DiCaprio the whole time.
Unfortunately, it’s understandable why he’d want to put off coming out for as long as possible — despite his insane real-life peppiness and apparent love for musical theater, his roles as of late have been pretty masculine (Helloooo Don Jon), and because Hollywood seems to think all gay men are queens, he probably worries he won’t get to play manly men anymore.
Even Neil Patrick Harris waited to officially come out until after he’d cemented his place in history as pop culture’s most lovable womanizer (though, with all the suiting up, Barney Stinson isn’t exactly masculine).