Rumor has it Jon Gosselin’s turned in at least three applications for a chance to star on I Love New York III.

This would be quite a boon to VH1′s audience, which currently consists mostly of scientists trying to study the transmission of unhindered STDs. They can color code their tv screens, as we understand it. We heard the star of Megan Wants A Millionaire glows green, whatever that means.

For the record, we made up the bit about Jon competing on ILNYIII. Also – Megan probably doesn’t glow fungal-green.

Jon starring on other shows, however, well that looks quite possible.

Things can’t be going too well on the set of Jon & Kate Plus Eight. After all, with the way Jon’s been jet setting, his kids are more likely to crayon a camera man into a hand-drawn family portrait than they are him. And lets not get started about how the kid with glasses still refuses to poop anywhere except the coffee table – isn’t he ten or something?! At least Windex it afterwards, kid!

And lets not even get into how the producers all feel. Because we don’t actually know. TMZ thinks they’ve got the scoop though:

“We’re told TLC is not happy with Jon Gosselin, but Jonnie boy may not care, because he has his sights set on a new show. We’re told Jon is in talks with a major production company — Endemol — to appear in a show called “Divorced Dad’s Club.” We’re told the show chronicles the lives of famous divorced fathers. We’re told producers talked to Jon, but he’s concerned about his TLC contract.”

That sounds terrible. And Jon may think so too. That’s why the above mentioned Endemol company recently said:

“No, we are not in talks with him as he is under contract with TLC. But, our show is currently in development although casting is not finalized yet.”

Let’s throw out some better reality tv-show ideas for Jon to consider should the opportunity ever arise. First – what about a show called ‘Jon & a Date Plus Eight.’ Take it easy Kate, we envision the eight in the title as referring to the number of times Hailey Glassman passes out in an indoor tree-planter per episode.

Yeah – that one’s OK. But what we’d really like to see is him 0n Octomom. He’s got the resume – and think how floored everyone would be if he was the secret sperm donor. We know – we’d watch too.

If Fox marketed it as a chance for Jon’s parental redemption, why, dare we say DVRs would whir.

Follow hecklerspray on Twitter!