Very very soon, you'll be seeing more of Johnny Depp than you'd ever imagined, as Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 is released allowing Johnny Depp the chance to do his "Gee, I don't know why I'm so famous" shtick all the time.
But although Johnny Depp has entered the Hollywood big league by doing a series of comedy double takes while pretending to be Keith Richards, you'll never see him play Michael Hutchence from INXS. Despite reports to the contrary, Depp will not be playing Hutchence in a biopic of his life. And a good job too – the soundtrack would be shit, for one.
Doing biopics of dead musicians is the fast-track to winning an Oscar these days. Jamie Foxx won an Oscar for his Ray Charles film, before he smeared his good reputation up the wall with that awful album he released earlier in the year. Similarly, the Johnny Cash movie Walk The Line did well at this year's Oscars. And it's launched a string of other opportunistic music biopics from Marvin Gaye to Bob Dylan. But by far the worst idea for a biopic – yes, even worse than the Missy Elliott one – is one about Michael Hutchence that's floating around.
You know who Michael Hutchence was, he was the lead singer of INXS – one of the very worst bands in the history of recorded music – and a man whose private life consisted of having it off with Kylie, having if off with Paula Yates and then hanging himself with a belt while having a wank. And when you think about casting a film about this man, who's the first name that springs to mind? That's right: Johnny Depp.
There's a script floating around about Michael Hutchence entitled Slide Away, and reports were starting to suggest that Johnny Depp had signed up to play Hutchence, with his old girlfriend Kate Moss starring as Paula Yates. But Johnny Depp has found time in between telling everyone he wants to be a pirate forever to laugh off the reports.
"It's not true. Somebody sent that to me and I read it and thought 'Wow, that's kind of interesting'. No-one ever approached me about it. I don't think I'd be the guy to play Michael. I knew him pretty well. He was pretty broad, Michael. He was kind of a glam guy. He was like a god, like a shaman, so I don't think I'd be the guy."
We're kind of torn about the idea of a Michael Hutchence/INXS film being made. On the one hand, it's bound to be terribly undeserved exercise in hero worship about a man who pretty much made a career out of one song. But on the other hand, if the Michael Hutchence/INXS biopic is a success, there's sure to be a sequel made about the shitty reality TV show that the rest of INXS made when they realised people only liked them for Michael Hutchence.
Read more:
Depp Denies He'll Play Hutchence In Film – NineMSN
[story by Stuart Heritage]
Paul says
Stuart… you suck!!!
What a pointless article.
andy says
LOVED THE PART ABOUT THERE’S SURE TO BE A SEQUEL MADE ABOUT THE SHITTY REALITY TV SHOW THAT
THE REST OF INXS MADE WHEN THEY REALISED PEOPLE ONLY LIKED THEM FOR MICHAEL HUTCHENCE.
monique says
Michael Hutchence/INXS, another depressing musician’s negative life. why on EARTH would ANYONE want to see it repeated and glorified on film?
Sue says
Stuart, you know nothing about Hutchence or INXS other than the tabloid headlines, the band sold many more millions of albums worldwide than you ever will & Hutchence is/was an amazing singer/songwriter performer. Stop dissing for the sake of.
ina says
”about a man who pretty much made a career out of one song”
ARE YOU SERIOUS?? Michael is a LEGEND, love his music, love his personality…no one else comes close to him
Justin says
listen mate in Australia we have a name for people like you “shit for brains” its pretty self explanatory isn
A says
I love Johnny’s polite way of declining. And a note to the writer: if you did any research on Johnny Depp or Hutchence for that matter, you would know not to slander either of them. Johnny D. doesn’t spend his days reading hollywood gossip, he does his job and lives his life away from the jet set lifestyle so..according to him…no..he just does his job…why would he be so popular when he is the first one doing everything possible to NOT be the sex symbol they make him out to be. Everyone knows this about him. This is the minimum information everyone is pretty much aware of. So..despite your insinuation that he is full of shite when he makes such statements…he actually doesn’t give a shit about what people like you will think or say about him. He is just very polite about making such statments, as you may not have noticed. As far as Hutchence goes..I never liked INXS music much but there’s no reason to trash the guy or not do a movie about his life when he was a world known successful singer. Perspective man…change your perspective.
ross says
michael was a legend- you are a moron…..end of
Edward says
INXS were not rubbish you dickhead. Have some respect for your betters. Michael Hutchence = somebody. You are a nobody, who can only hold an article together with slanderous remarks. I hope you get sacked!
Loz says
Stuart Heritage= world class uneducated idiot.
From looking at your ugly face and reading your stupid whingey bitchy articles nobody here will take your verbal diarrhea seriously.
As an Australian i feel insulted, as a fan of INXS and Michael times that by two.
And as for slagging off the dead, cheap shots do not earn you respect in the business, you have been warned!
The fact that Johnny and Michael were friends makes this article even more insulting and tasteless.
And contrary to a lot of peoples belief Michael actually had an equally positive number of experiences in his life.
And it has never been determined if he passed away from suicide or autoerotic asphyxiation. Reasearch it!
If you got off your egotistical arse and actually researched INXS and their music then you would find that your entire ‘article’ and your delusions about ‘a man who pretty much made a career out of one song’ is a crock of shit.
Has your pea brain ever heard of wikipedia or google?
I’m sure your miniscule intellect can manage googling the word ‘INXS’ or are you too busy wanking over your own lame articles because no one else will?
Oh and the definition of Verbal Diarrhea “A condition suffered by an individual who has the inablility to shut the fuck up”.
ie. Get a REAL job Stuart, because frankly you suck at this one, get off your fat arse and actually contribute to humanity.
Loz says
Agreed. I could think of other names for him too
Bowler17 says
Stuart, why the hell are you dissing INXS?! How can you hear even just 1 INXS song and not think they’re the best?!! Plus, they were, and still are, since they’re still around, ONE OF THE GREATEST BANDS TO RECORD IN MUSIC HISTORY. The only reason you are saying this stuff is most likely because your just not a fan. But for the billions of INXS fans out there, SHUT THE FUCK UP! And if you’re going to talk shit of any of the members of the band, especially Michael, it is just insulting and a load of crap. You are pathetic! Michael Hutchence, Jon/Tim/Andrew Farriss, Garry Beers, Kirk Pengilly, and also JD Fortune are, and always will be #1. And have some respect for Michael’s legacy. The fact that Johnny Depp and Hutch were friends makes your lame-ass article even more sad and insulting! In my family, we have a name for losers like you- DUMBASS. You know nothing of INXS or Michael, and obviously you never will by the looks of your shity articles. YOU SUCK!
Jesse Hipster says
Sorry man … I hate to say someone is wrong, the worse you or your ignorance you are. The story only isnt the newspapers say, INXS was the only band that overshadowed the hell out of U2 at that time and raised many more questions than answers … real band, that makes you think and question the faith beyond self-imposed for education and society. Romanticism, spirituality and dirt … all so real. Closer to Rolling Stones or The Doors than anything else. Again, how sad is to ignore …
Anthony says
The man was a very innovative singer. And he definitely had more than one hit. These people who do stuff for charity, because they were only one hit wonders. Get knighted and think their God. Bob Geldof is a asshole. And it’s a crying shame he has that little girl.
Si Sharp says
Please list some of Michael Hutchence’s vocal innovations (genuinely curious).
He was certainly an innovative masturbator.
KAM 619 says
FUCK YOU STUART. YOU IGNORANT PIECE OF SHIT..
INXS FAN! says
Stuart Fuck you! This article is a cheap shot at defenseless man who is now deceased. What a low life piece of shit you are. By reading this article makes me wonder did Michael turn you down for an interview and one point and this is your way to get over a bruised ego???? You are lame.
The music of INXS rivaled US and many others, Michael was the heart-throb of chics everywhere when I was growing up. Guess your jealous he had hot ass woman after him and a dog won’t give you the time of day.
Michael took his own life for reasons we will never know, only way to look inside his mind is to listen to his solo CD, clearly he was depressed and took his own life out of despair on Nov 22 1997. RIP Michael!
Penny says
I don’t know the writer of this article. I didn’t know Michael Hutchence other than through his music and performances. As a fan, a biopic would be pretty interesting to me. I have never heard of Hutchence intentionally being cruel to people he didn’t know. Like lots of his fans, I heard about how human and flawed he was. That just makes him more like the rest of us. I wonder if the author of this article can relate to that. Apparently, since they sold so many records, INXS’s music was something a lot of people liked. The fact that they remained a band – and, from what I’ve heard and read, true friends – speaks to something decent about them as people. Mr. Heritage, if you didn’t like the man, couldn’t you have just said that while reporting the news of the biopic? There was no reason for you to come across as insulting and mean – unless that was your only purpose in writing this. If so, then that mostly speaks to your own character and professional goals. I hope people will be nicer if they ever have chance to report on you.