Harry Potter almost met his end early, and unintentionally.
Think about all the crushed devil-worshipping children the world over who would have lost at least two night's sleep without knowing the fate of their adolescent hero. They'd have been tossing and turning never knowing if Ron ever got out of the carbonite he was left trapped in at the end of book six, or if Gollum would ever really lead Indiana Jones to the magic skulls of Jacob and Esau.
You see, there was a strict ban against carry-on luggage in planes for a bit there, and that ban extended towards J.K. Rowling's only copy of Harry Potter book 7. J.K. Rowling was in the States with the Harry Potter manuscript (some of it was only handwritten), and she had to get it home, but she refused to part with the Harry Potter book for fear it'd fall into the wrong hands.
And the wrong hands it did fall into. Read excerpts from chapters 3-7 on the next page.
We don't really have any Harry Potter 7 excerpts, but we heard the basic plot of Harry Potter 7 – you know, the one where Harry Potter bites it – revolves around Harry's ever-changing body. Even if we did have real precise excerpts, we wouldn't post them – J.K. Rowling's got expensive phonebook-type lawyers. Ours works in a deli most weekends. Yeah, we'd get crushed in court, but lunch-time would be awesome!
Now back to the nitty-gritty here – airport officials in NYC tried telling J.K. Rowling to stuff her only full copy of the new Harry Potter manuscript into her luggage as carry-ons were banned. That's not a good idea – remember what happened to Lindsay Lohan's luggage last week? Those airport suitcase-conveyor belts have a tendency to eat celebrity valuables. J.K. Rowling thought so too. This is what she said about her battle of wills:
"The heightened security restrictions on the airlines made the journey back from New York interesting, as I refused to be parted from the manuscript of book seven. A large part of it is handwritten and there was no copy of anything I had done while in the U.S….They let me take it on, thankfully, bound up in elastic bands."
America's Transportation Security Administration back-peddled out of that one fast. One of their slaves said TSA:
"never implemented a ban on carryon luggage for flights originating in the United States. A manuscript would certainly be allowed to be carried on."
For those of you dying to know, J.K. Rowling's got the title for Harry Potter 7 narrowed down to two choices. One she quite likes, the other is Harry Potter And His Extreme Reluctance To Stand Up At The End Of Fourth Period English Without His Text Books Strategically In Front Of Him.
But that one really wouldn't fit on the spine, now would it?
Read more:
JK Rowling Challenges Airport Security – Forbes
[story by Shawn Lindseth]
Harry Balzack says
Harry Sez: “Wait…this broad has made so much f*ing money off of this Harry Potter crap that she
still flies commerical?? Ah, you Brits are a funny lot!”
Willow says
This has got to be one of the most ludicrous statements I’ve ever had the displeasure of reading: “Think about all the crushed devil-worshipping children the world over who would have lost at least two night’s sleep without knowing the fate of their adolescent hero…” I’m an adult, but if I had a child I would have no problem with JK Rowling.
Just who do you think you are? Do you mean to imply that anyone who reads Harry Potter books MUST worship Satan and practice
the black arts?????
Back up what you say with explanation and don’t just stereotype an entire group of the population when you obviously have nothing
better to do!
Captain Great says
You Willow are, alas, a fucking idiot.
Gilbert Wham says
Well, quite.
Littledragon0007 says
i love harry potter from Jk Rowling. And to all christan’s go to hell witch i dont believe in nor heaven i just think you go poof or you can go there or a Black Hole and i dont mean the one in outerspace.
Your Mom says
I agree wholeheartedly with you, Willow!
Noelani says
I think people should be more cautious with the books that they are letting there children read. J.K. Rowlings is trying to put confusion into little kids lifes and parents all over the world need to know that J.K. Rowlings is nothing good.I will pray that her career in making these Harry Potter books will go down hiil and i will pray most importantly for her….. She needs help with the blood of Jesus Christ.I want people all over the world to know who J.K. Rowlings really is.She is a minipulater,she is decieving,she is a liar,And most importantly SHE WORSHIPS THE DEVIL. Now listen i am a teenager and i know signs of satanism when i see them. I am a devoted christian who believes that J.K. Rowlings is a person who is trying to convince young ones that magic is o.k. to use.Weither or not you do it you will always be participating if you read her books, buy her books or even watch the Harry Potter movies.Your not kids anymore so open up your eyes and see the living truth.
euclid says
No Elan I = Fucking Idiot Me = humorless crustacean
What’s all this about a ban on carrion luggage?
If she want’s to drag around a dead body stuffed with paper
why should that be a problem in the Land of the Free(aks)™?
lola says
u knoe wat euclid!!! dont criticize her… i agree with her whole heartidly. she may be a teenager but she speaks the truth and what is on her mind… nd if ur a FREAK 2!!! well DEN LET IT B
me? says
Yes, because JK Rowling puts pen to paper and expresses her imagination, she MUST have satanic ideas. Really guys. Get a grip, if you don’t like the stories, don’t read them, but let the rest of us worship Satan like we do everyday. :) I know that because Harry Potter defeated the evil Lord Voldemort, I should commit sins. And since Dobby taught us about freedom I think I might go deface public property. And above all, JK Rowlings beautiful Patronus symbolism have forced me to defy Christianity.
P.S.
God created JK Rowling,
God created ideas,
God created imagination
Imagination created Harry Potter
thus, God created Harry Potter (if thats what you want to believe)
So….. did you ever stop to think that you’re wrong instead of the rest of the world?
Princess227 says
I think that if parents teach their children correctly then they should not worry about what their child reads. If the family is a strong Christian family then they should make sure the child knows what ever Christians believe. I starting the books as a child and I plan on becoming a book editor. The people of the world are idiots if they think these wonderful books are corrupting their children. If their child is no smart enough to know this stuff is not real, well they should not be reading anything. They should not read things like Winnie the Pooh, because the little idiots are going to think animals can talk. These books are part of the reason I LOVE to read and I will love these books forever!
Krakken says
Fucking idiot…