We’re starting to get the impression that Jessica Alba is running out of ways to keep her pregnancy sexy.

That’s not to say that she didn’t do a good job initially – in the early stages Jessica Alba all but demanded that everyone in the vicinity had to gawp at her massive new boobs for hours on end. But then that was followed by a confusing mid-section where Jessica Alba revealed that she kept chucking her boyfriend out. That’s a sort of fiery thing to do, and fiery can sometimes be a little bit sexy, so we all went along with it.

And now? Now Jessica Alba has announced that, um, she’s only going to talk Spanish to her new baby. Which is… well, it’s crap, let’s not beat around the bush.