Jessica Alba Gets The Eye

The Eye was one of the highlights of the wave of Asian horror films that followed in the wake of The Ring. But it had one vital ingredient missing - a pouting starlet running around in a skintight bikini for the entire time.

So thank God that Tom Cruise and Paula Wagner are producing an all-star Hollywood remake of The Eye, which is set to star everyone's favourite 'not very good but quite pretty' actress Jessica Alba. It's thought that the new Jessica Alba-starring version of The Eye will be set in the new location of a skindiving community, and instead of a lot of scary stuff happening, The Eye will just be two hours of Jessica Alba walking out of the sea and shaking herself dry in slow motion. And it'll be called The Nipple instead of The Eye. But, you know, more or less the same.

Hollywood remakes of Asian horror films are always patchy affairs. In the place of subtlety, slow dread and unexplained creepiness, the movies are stuffed with loud noises, jarring exposition and Buffy The Vampire Slayer walking around looking a bit dim. And things don't look like they'll change with the announcement that everyone's fantasy girlfriend Jessica Alba is set to star in a Hollywood remake of The Eye.

The original Hong Kong version of The Eye was a nightmarish tale of a woman haunted by harrowing images after she has a cornea transplant, and then investigates the original owner of her eye. And it probably couldn't be any scarier if it included a five-minute sequence of Alan Sugar dancing naked.

The Hollywood version of The Eye has been long in the pipeline. Originally, Paramount had the rights and Renee Zellweger was set to be the star, but now Lionsgate is set to make the movie with young Jessica Alba taking the lead and Frenchmen David Moreau and Xavier Palud directing. And now Jessica Alba is all but attached to The Eye, we can expect to see it sexed up a little and gratuitous scenes of monkey love shoehorned in.

Although the Jessica Alba-starring The Eye won't start shooting until the winter, we can be sure of one thing - we're ready to buy the issue of Playboy that has Jessica Alba thrashing around in terror as she's set upon by a swarm of angry ghosts on the cover.

Read more:

The Eye Of The Lion - IGN

[story by Stuart Heritage]