Yesterday was a beautiful, moving, historic day – Jennifer Lopez totally sang a duet with Marc Anthony! Squeee!

You know what that means? That Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony care about Barack Obama enough to perform in Washington on the night of his inauguration? No way! It means that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are deliberately showing the world a sincere display of their love for one another to fight claims that they’ll get divorced on Valentine’s day.

So, OK, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony won’t get divorced on Valentine’s day. May bank holiday it is, then. Set your watches, kids.

If there’s one lesson that we choose to live our lives by, it’s this: never, ever underestimate Jennifer Lopez’s ability to make it all about herself. It’s a lesson that’s served us well so far in life, and it’s the sole reason why we didn’t fall backwards off our chair gagging and spluttering and clawing at our face last night.

Because last night Jennifer Lopez outdid herself. Last night, Jennifer Lopez managed to make the inauguration of the first black president in the history of America all about her. And that takes some doing – believe us, we tried.

You see, while the rest of the celebrity world celebrated the inauguration of Barack Obama by either promising to not be a shit mum on his behalf or – in the case of Aretha Franklin – wearing a silly hat and singing a bunch of free-associated words to the tune of God Save The Queen, Jennifer Lopez decided to show the world that she probably wasn’t going to get divorced from her husband Marc Anthony as quickly as everyone thought.

There’s been a lot of speculation that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are going to get divorced in a little over three weeks – speculation substantiated by Jennifer’s appearance at the Golden Globes last week, where she dressed in little more than a a sparkly hanky and didn’t have her wedding ring on. And that’s why, with the entire world watching, Jennifer Lopez last night decided to set the record straight by singing a loving duet with Marc Anthony at an inauguration ball. People reports:

The crooner completed his inaugural performance by bringing “my wife,” Jennifer Lopez, on to the stage with him, for a duet… Earlier in the evening, Anthony had said, “I wrote this next song about Jennifer. I must have been psychic.” The song was his decade-old “You Sang to Me.” The couple ended their duet with a kiss. “Man, she’s cute,” Anthony said after Lopez exited the stage.

There’s nothing about this story that isn’t completely adorable. The slightly-too-long-for-the-sake-of-photographers kiss, the hamfisted verbal reassurance that Marc Anthony still finds Jennifer Lopez attractive, the way he dedicated You Sang To Me to her, the way he also dedicated the follow-up song I’m Keeping The TV You Dreadful Bitch. All of it, adorable from beginning to end.

And, we have to admit, it worked. We no longer believe that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony are getting divorced. Well, we do, but but we promise to look surprised when it happens. We think that’s what they want, anyway.

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