We're a bunch of inventors here at hecklerspray, you know.

It's just a goshdarn crying shame that the UK Patent Office has yet to realise our genius. Okay, okay… so we never actually tested that time machine made of potatoes. And, sure, that teleportation system that runs entirely on warthog urine is only hypothetical. But – seriously – give us a break, guys. Do you think medicines are tested out before they're released? Maybe on, like, animals or something? Yeah, right – give us a call when the spaceship lands, you nutters.

This whole invention malarkey is good for one thing, though – it's gone and given us another reason to hate omnipresent TV chef Jamie Oliver.

Jamie is also an inventor, you see. He's come up with something he calls the 'Flavour Shaker', an odd little ceramic pepperpot-type-thing that works as follows (instructions courtesy of the product website):

'Simply pop your ingredients inside, add the magic ball and give it a good shake. The ceramic ball does all the work crushing, grinding and bruising the contents, releasing amazing aromas and zingy flavours. You can also add liquids like oil and cream to create delicious dressings and marinades. The Flavour Shaker is sized to give you just the right amount of marinade or dressing (you don't need a lot) so that you can pour the contents straight over your food.'

Jamie is understandably quite proud of his new innovation. So much so, in fact, that he's found himself in a spot of bother with TV regulator Ofcom. It's not happy with the amount of advertising Jamie is doing – and bizarrely enough, it's not referring to the Sainsbury's campaign, a set of commercials so teeth-grindingly irritating that – whenever they turn up on the hecklerspray office TV set – the nurses come round and put us on that pesky 'suicide watch'.

Ofcom is actually referring to Jamie's recent TV series Jamie At Home, during which 'undue prominence' was given to Jamie's Flavy-Shaky-Whatever. We assume that 'undue prominence' actually means 'Mr. Oliver was gurning repeatedly to camera every five seconds and mouthing the words 'Flavour Shaker', before going back to his usual routine of explaining the fine art of cooking in the affected manner of a cockney greyhound wrangler.' But we're not quite sure.

Jamie isn't the only one to get in trouble, however. The allegations were included in the latest Ofcom report, which also features complaints about 'a dog fighting scene on Turner Classic Movies.'

Now, there's a Cary Grant moment we must have missed.

Read More:

Ofcom: Jamie Oliver rapped for plugging Flavour Shaker - Mediabreak