Jade Goody Banned From India?

Jade Goody Banned India Big Brother RacistVolkswagen-with-lipstick Jade Goody is apparently having a few problems with her upcoming trip to India.

The excursion abroad, which began life as a  cynical marketing attempt to make a racist imbecile look slightly better voyage to embrace a distant and unique culture, has so far encountered an itsy-bitsy setback. See, while all of Jade's grovelling PR minions have been posted their Indian Visas within the space of 24 little hours, the barely-literate Ms. Goody has found that her application may take a little time to 'process'.

Heaven forbid this should upset Jade further. Reports have been flooding in recently that claim she is on the verge of suicide – an act that could either be deemed 'tragic' or 'a fine example of Darwinism in action', dependent on how sane you are.

A source from India claimed by way of explanation:

"There is a lot to consider in relation to what she said."

What – you mean those horrendously racist babblings? Well… you see… we mean…

Sigh.

Oh, okay, India. You caught us out. You want the truth? We weren't really sending Jade Goody over to 'apologise' for her behaviour at all. We just wanted to get rid of her, the same way you see a tired homeless dog occasionally barking in triumph as it manages to rip a bloodsucking tick from its shaggy fur coat. Yeah, yeah, we admit it – we had no real intention of bringing her back.

But look on the bright side, guys. If you do let her into your country – and you're planning on carrying out another of those nuclear tests vis-a-vis your ongoing conflict with Pakistan – then surely you could use a human target to determine the accuracy of your weapons, right?

Just think about it. Even for an essentially emotionless missile-directing computer program, what more satisfying target could there be than flying a six-megaton warhead right into the gaping mouth of that vacuous, pointless lardball?

Assuming she doesn't manage to eat it first.

Read More:

Jade denied entry to India! – Entertainmentwise

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Comments

  1. Souldevil says

    Aw, c’mon… don’t ban Jade from India. She wants to learn from her mistakes and say sorry to Mr Poppadum and Mrs Fuckarala.

  2. says

    It’s pathetic!! Jade didnt say anything racist – as she admitted, she’s just got a big mouth and was very annoyed at the time. The things she said just blurted out but she never once said anything racist to or about Shilpa! Cant see what all the fuss is about!!! I think we have more important things to sort than Jade’s angry outburst!!

  3. twat says

    fuck of h you twit. The idiot is a racsist, blurt outs are usually a good idication of the underlying mind.

  4. rudolfbuzzer says

    The best news article I’ve read. Maybe she will learn how to talk – wishful thinking. Most obviously will stuff her filthy face with fcuking popadoms. You just know some local is going to bitch-slap some sence into her.

  5. says

    QUOTE:

    “twat Says:
    January 26th, 2007 at 6:59 pm

    fuck of h you twit. The idiot is a racsist, blurt outs are usually a good idication of the underlying mind.”

    I think he/she means a freudian slip…

  6. Roy Le Pre says

    On this extremely important global issue of Jade Goody’s attitude towards the peoples of the Indian subcontinent, let us, just people as we must be, make no errors. Jade has said she is not racist. Well, of course! That must be right. She is an, honest, upright, intelligent member of the British public, who, like many of us, enjoys the odd bit of abusing someone here and there. What harm is there in that? There cannot be any doubts that she is not racist. Neither, of course, was Robert Kiljoy-Silk who insisted he meant well and meant what he said in declaring Arabs “……amputators….repressors” et al. He wasn’t generalising, of couse. Just a casual remark and NO discrimination meant there.

    How paranoid are the people. Take the abuse, guys! It’s what people do here. Just don’t call it racism. Indians can be called poppadums just as the English are called des rosbif in France. All well and good.

    How we love being called rosbif…..don’t we? Not a sign of French disdain, surely !!