Back in ’89, Back to the Future 2 premiered on cinema screens and everyone went wild for hoverboards and his Nike Air Mag. As hoverboards aren’t likely to hit production anytime soon, Nike seem to be toying with the idea of releasing the sneakers to the world.
Wise move. You’ll get ironic buyers and people who just think they’re the bee’s knees. In fairness, self-lacing hi-tops are pretty cool.
Over the jump, you’ll see a video called ?Marty McFly?s Closet? which should get you retronauts all giddy for a pair of ‘Air Mags’. So what else should make the leap from fiction to reality?
Before we get going, here’s the video of a stock room filled with Nike Air Mags.
Is it going to excite you to the point where you’ll wet yourself? Do you think it’ll have the little button that clasps them shut around your horrible, stinkin’ feet?
Either way, have a look.
So what other products would we like to see? Of course, we encourage you to get in the comments and tell us what you’d like to see on the shelves.
Burgers, by and large, are pretty disappointing. That’s because they’re not unhealthy enough. While people argue the toss over McDonald’s and Burger King (or Wendy’s if you’re lucky enough to live in America), it is clear that the king of burgers is the Big Kahuna Burger. Why? Because Samuel L. Jackson says so while wearing an afro. That’s all the review you need. It is obviously dripping in grease and a heart attack waiting to happen. Perfect.
If Fruli and Rekorderlig exist in this world of ours, then why not Skittlebrau? If it’s good enough for a seasoned ale-can like Homer Simpson, then it’s surely good enough for the rest of us. Why Skittles haven’t teamed up with someone to make this obviously delicious summer beverage, we’ve no idea.
Similar to ‘the excessive machine’ in Barbarella, The Orgasmatron is a device from Woody Allen’s Sleeper. Basically, it’s a huge cylinder that you and someone else climb into and… well… you can guess what happens next. Who wouldn’t want one of these in their house?
Life is hard. Why muck about chucking yourself off a bridge into oncoming traffic? You might gently land on a traffic jam. Overdose? Seems a bit grotty. And so, Futurama’s ‘Suicide Booth’ would be perfect. Stick in 25 cents and you’re away, crossing to the other side without a care in the world. Marvellous.
While many think of Duff as the greatest fictional beer, it is in fact Heisler that takes the crown. Heisler is a fake brand of beer that's been in TV and film for years. Heisler (available in regular and light) has starred in Malcolm in the Middle, My Name is Earl and, most notably, Denzel Washington offers Ethan Hawke a Heisler in a famous scene in Training Day. It’s the Wilhelm Scream of drinks. The company that invented the brew – ISS – also make Jekyll Island Beer, which starred in Lost.
Anything made by Acme
Acme are, without doubt, the greatest company that never existed. You will have seen them in Looney Toons and they make absolutely everything, and all of it defective. Wile E. Coyote is their biggest customer, but even Elmer Fudd once bought an Acme Wild Cat, who alas, didn’t attack the subject intended. They’ve made sinister parcel wrapping devices, rocket powered roller skates, exploding tennis balls, bat costumes and more. Acme even made the leap from cartoons to other shows, making an appearance in I Love Lucy. Wile. E even sued Acme! Click here to read his lawsuit.
So, what have we missed out? Feel free to demand fictional products in the comments.
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