So recently I came upon this Instagram account called kimsoldface, and I’m sure you won’t be surprised to learn that it’s an account solely devoted to posting pictures of Kim Kardashian before she started to look like a mixture of modern day LaToya Jackson and a Siamese cat.
The first thing I thought when I stumbled on this account was “Wow, I can’t believe my Kardashian-obsessed ass didn’t make this first.” The second thing I thought was, “Wow, I really really miss Kim Kardashian’s old face.”
I feel like over the past year I’ve spent so much time focusing on the inquiry into the missing Kylie Jenner cover up, or on fake Kylie Jenner’s relationship with that piece of beef jerky dressed up at Chester Cheeto aka Tyga, that I’ve really lost focus on Kim, and her every evolving face.
I mean, you can’t blame me for getting caught up in Kylie these days. You know all those apps that can change and edit your face, like make your nose smaller, your face thinner, your eyes and lips bigger, then add some fierce make up and filters thus giving you an insanely hot selfie that doesn’t really look much like the original picture of you? I feel like Kylie Jenner put all those apps on her face…but like, in real life.
Unlike Kylie, I don’t think that Kim has been replaced by anyone new, but I do think bitch has had sooooo much unnecessary work. So tonight (or this morning, or afternoon, whatever time I post this), I’d like to pour one out and light a candle for Kim Kardashian’s old face: a face that was actually really pretty and exotic and didn’t need to be fucked up. Let’s have a walk down memory lane, some pics courtesy of kimsoldface, of course.
I mean, I recognize Kourtney in this picture. Sure, she’s like 10 years younger, but still the same person, but seriously, who are those other two pictures in the picture with her? Because that doesn’t look a damn thing like the Khloe and Kim I see on the reg now. However, this Kim does look way nicer.
(sidenote: I think all the Kardashian sisters and a bunch of their groupies like Jonathan Cheban have blocked the kimsoldface on Instagram LOL)
Seriously, look how pretty and exotic she used to be? Why did you have to play yourself like that Kimmy?!
Even after her first nose job she looked really good, but no, she couldn’t stop there, she had to keep going. Here’s first nose job Kim:
Now all we have is this person:
I don’t even know who the fuck that is.
I legit don’t even recognize half the Kardashian/Jenners anymore and it’s legit traumatic. Thank God for Kendall and Kourtney or I wouldn’t even know what I was watching anymore.