Hulk Hogan Robbed, Threats Of Leg-Drops Expected

Hulk Hogan is the David Beckham of wrestling. No, he doesn’t have a pointless wife or an alleged big-nosed lover. He is one of the most respected individuals in his field with a career that has spanned many years.

Sadly, Hulk Hogan can’t fight forever and has long since hung up his boots and sweaty lycra undies. But if you thought that was the last you’d ever see of the Hulkster, then you sir would be sadly mistaken. Following The Osbournes, Hulk Hogan regularly parades his family round to us like their in some sort of human zoo. Although it's on TV so we can’t throw peanuts at them or call them rude names. While filming continues for Hulk Hogan's reality TV show, a shock revelation has rippled through the family. They’ve been robbed! And we expect some ass kickings as Hulk sets out to find the critters responsible. 

Straight away, we can assume that whoever was responsible for nicking some goods from Hulk Hogan’s son Nick isn’t that intelligent. Yes Nick Hogan does appear to be a cocky little shit and we would like to batter his ass, but you have to remember who his dad is. The old playground chant of “my dad’s bigger then my dad” wouldn’t really work here as Hulk Hogan really is as big as they come. We’d have to stock up on steroids like Chris Benoit, but not enough to go on a mad killing spree.  

So we can assume that the burglars who will get an inevitable whopping in the ring aren’t part of the TV crew either. Hecklerspray has only been on the TV once, but we can assume that if you’re filming a family of four 24/7 in a big fuck-off house you’ll need a lot of cameras. Cameras that will more than likely capture everything going on, including the act of someone nicking your stuff. According to reports, it sounds like a fair bit of gear got nicked, costing more than all of our possessions put together:

Nick, 17, told police he had left a diamond-encrusted watch and two gold chains in a shirt on his bed but they had vanished when he returned to collect them.

Wow, £75,000 worth of tacky-sounding jewellry sounds like a lot but with someone who could probably wipe their arse with $100 notes, we’re sure he’ll be able to get over it fairly quickly and get round to making more shit reality TV shows. We only watch it to perv over his daughter anyway. So if she needs any counselling over the whole traumatic issue, she’s more then welcome to crash round to our pad where we offer a whole range of soothing therapy. Aren’t we sweet? 

Read more: 

Hulk Hogan's Home Robbed Of Jewellery - Digital Spy