Michael Bay is in Hong Kong filming his next big budget shittastic film, Transformers: Age Of Extinction. Somehow in between banging extras and being a total douchebag, Bay managed to find time to get his ass attacked by some locals. And on his first day there!
Of course his production company, and Bay himself, tried to turn the whole thing around by saying Bay was a hero who saved the day like one of the action heroes in his films, but does anyone really believe that? Everyone knows if it doesn’t involve Bay’s tiny dick or his hugely inflated ego, he couldn’t give two shits about it. He doesn’t even care about the quality of his films anymore, as long as he makes enough to continue to get chicks way hotter than him to sleep with him for possible roles.
When film crews arrived in Hong Kong, Bay and his team paid a ton of street vendors and their families a couple of bucks to compensate for the disruption filming would cause (and for the highly probable banging of their daughters done by Bay). For some though, the money given wasn’t enough to cover the eye pain that would follow from having to see Bay’s leathery face for multiple days.
Some of those unhappy were apparently the two Mak brothers. They approached Bay and demanded they be given 100,000 Hong Kong dollars, which sounds like a shit ton but really only amounts to about $12,000 USD. Bay told the brothers to screw themselves, and one of them decided to attack Bay with an air conditioner. Hong Kong thugs are too good for shanks or guns, apparently. After a little struggle, with Bay taking a shot to the face, the police came and arrested the brothers. Bay said afterwards that the brothers were demanding 4x what they paid, and he would not be blackmailed. So, everyone was given about $3000? Well, now it is totally understandable why the brothers wanted more. That is not nearly enough to have to deal with Bay’s bullshit.
As updated reports came out, the story just got crazier and crazier. It went from 2 brothers attacking Bay with an appliance and getting clocked in the face (which was awesome enough), to 2 brothers on drugs trying to extort Bay who didn’t get hurt, to 2 brothers on some Zombie drug type shit and Bay heroically fought them off and saved the entire crew and half of Hong Kong, until over 2 dozen cops were finally able to apprehend the perps. Because if 15 police officers have issues controlling 2 guys, it is totally believable that Bay could successfully take them on himself and leave unscathed.
No one would be surprised if Bay is hoping to turn this incident into his next big budget flop. He’d of course have Chris Hemsworth play him, although if we’re going by appearance it should totally be Michael Bolton. And the 2 brothers will turn into aliens, the air conditioner will be a car, and instead of 15 cops it will be the entire Hong Kong military. But it’ll be okay because Bay will save the day!
This story is just like Transformers 3 ticket sales were- no one is buying it.