By now, you’re probably right to assume that nobody is ever going to shut up about Michael Jackson’s death, ever.
Yes, he’s been dead since last June. But, the way things are going, there’s always going to be something for people to froth on about. First there was Michael Jackson’s death, then there was his silly golden coffin, then that creepy film of his – and now there’s the fact that an amended death certificate confirms Michael Jackson’s cause of death as homicide.
You’re also probably right to assume that this is the first thing of Michael Jackson’s since his death that Jermaine Jackson won’t try and take undue credit for. But who knows, eh? He does seem to love doing that an awful lot.
You know how Michael Jackson died after taking a dose of that unusually powerful sedative that he’d become hopelessly addicted to? Well you’ll never guess what – the latest word on the street is that Michael Jackson’s real cause of death was a dose of that unusually powerful sedative that he’d become hopelessly addicted to. We know, we’re just as shocked as you are.
But it’s all there, in an amended Michael Jackson death certificate that’s just been uncovered by the News Of The World. Here’s what it had to say on the matter:
On the original July 7 certificate deputy coroner Cheryl MacWillie refuses to give a cause of death. But after further probes, it is amended on August 31 by medical examiner Christopher Rogers to “homicide”. He concludes Jacko died from “acute Propofol intoxication” due to an “intra-venous injection by another”.
This – apart from reinforcing something that everyone already knew from about two hours after Michael Jackson died anyway – means that all heads now turn to Dr Conrad Murray, the doctor who allegedly administered the drug. He’s already been blamed for Michael Jackson’s death by Janet Jackson, and now he’s thought to be in the process of hiring a defence attorney in case he ends up getting charged with involuntary manslaughter.
If that happens, and the case goes to trial, then at least we’ll all get to finally discover Murray’s sick motives for finishing Michael Jackson off. Was it down to a personal grudge between the pair? Or was it down to Murray’s rampant jealousy over Michael Jackson’s enormous fame and wealth? Or was it maybe, just maybe, because Michael Jackson was addicted to Propofol and he paid for Murray to supply him with it and administer it to him and if Murray didn’t do it then Michael Jackson would have quickly found another doctor who would? Maybe we’ll never know.
We’re not even sure if we buy the homicide angle at all, in fact. Because, just a few short months ago, Michael Jackson’s spirit was summoned up on live TV. And if he was murdered, he would have probably wanted to mention that from beyond the grave. But he didn’t. He just said “Say hello to Quincy Jones for me!” in a funny voice and then wobbled his head around a bit. We’re no lawyers, but we think that means Dr Conrad Murray has no need to worry.
We should probably stress again that we’re not lawyers. Honestly, we can’t make that clear enough.