What kind of a person considers a triflin’ ass bitch having a revenge baby to finesse her enemies a positive highlight of 2017? Me. I am that kind of person, and while Day 14 was dedicated to the goodness in Ariana Grande’s heart, Day 15 will be dedicated to the pettiness in Blac Chyna’s.
I spent 2016 watching Rob Kardashian get PLAAAAAAYED by Blac Chyna, because homeboy was too blinded by the fake ass to realize just how used he was being. Well, needless to say, Rob got real woke about Blac Chyna in 2017, and Chyna got real paid.
Chyna finished 2016 by giving birth to Dream Kardashian. Rob thinks Chyna wanted to name their daughter the dumb ass fucking stripper name of “Dream” because their baby girl was a “dream come true”, but in reality, Chyna wanted to really rub it in Kris Jenner’s face that this baby was the Kardashian’s worst NIGHTMARE, because now they’d have to deal with Chyna and give her that sweet Kardashian money FOREVER.
Flash forward to 2017 and Chyna makes Rob spend $100k on rebuilding her body (we all need that sweet post-baby bounce back, I guess) and then leaves his ass to throw her newly fixed up va-jay-jay to every Instagram rapper from here to Atlanta.
Meanwhile, Kylie Jenner is trying to sue Chyna for being a crazy bitch who beat the shit out of the home Kylie owned and let her live in.
Of course, Chyna can’t be played like that. Chyna decides to start sending Rob twisted af pictures and videos of her fucking other dudes, which leads to Rob’s Instagram meltdown. Rob posts a ton of private nude pics of Chyna, gets kicked off of Instagram, and is now being looked into for distributing revenge porn. Poor victim Chyna shows up to court in her nicest “white lady from the suburbs” weave and bam, Rob has to pay her $20k a month in child support, while Chyna cackles her way to the strip club. And because she’s got that baby, there isn’t SHIT the Kardashians or Jenners can do.
I know all of this is super fucked up, and I actually do feel bad for Dream, but the way Chyna played this shit has made for blogging gold for me, and I have NEVER seen a woman take her pettiness so fucking seriously. Slow clap for you, Blac Chyna, you fucking mess.