Oi! Reprobates! You look like a bunch of degenerates that look like you use booze as a crutch to get you through your despairingly dreadful life!
Chances are, you’re one of those ‘heavy metal sorts’ who bangs your giant, hairy head to deeply unfashionable music without a care in the world. Metallica, Slayer and all those rasping, wailing bands really tickle your pickle, right?
We like you. And we’re going to get you drunk.
So, in honour of the Big 4 (Metallica, Slayer, Anthrax and Megadeth) playing Yankee Stadium next week, J?germeister have sent us a load of cocktail recipes.
We’re not even accepting freebies or payment for this one. We just think it’s a great idea. Of course, if J?ger’ want to sort us out with some freebies, we won’t say no.
They won’t though.
They’ve already used us for publicity and we’re mugs for not making unreasonable demands first.
Oh well. There’s always hard liquor to get us through our crippling depression.
Here are the heavy metal cocktail recipes, that’s if you’re not too macho to actually spend time making a drink as opposed to guzzling down bottles of Newcastle Brown Ale and smashing them over your head like alcohol is going out of fashion.
Angel of Death – Slayer
1.5oz Old Overholt Rye
1oz J?germeister
1oz Averna
3 dashes Jerry Thomas Decanter Bitters
Brandied Cherries
Build, stir with ice and garnish with a cherry
Reign in Blood-Slayer
2oz J?germeister
.75oz Beefeater 24
.5oz Raspberry Simple Syrup
.5oz Iced Tea
Combine all ingredients in a mixing glass. Add Ice and Stir
Strain into a Double Old Fashioned Glass
Lemon Twist for garnish
Bring The Noise-Anthrax
1.5oz J?germeister
1.5oz Grapefruit Juice
.5oz Don Q anejo rum
.5oz Velvet Falernum
Combine all ingredients with Ice, Shake and strain into a tall glass.
Devil?s Island-Megadeth
1.5oz Don Q Anejo Rum
1oz J?germeister
.5oz Velvet Falernum
1oz Fresh Oj
1oz Pineapple Juice
2 dashes angostura
Combine all ingredients in a tall glass, swizzle with crushed ice. Add more crushed ice and float with J?germeister on top. Garnish with a pineapple leaf
Five Magics – Megadeth
1oz J?germeister
1oz Plymouth Gin
1oz Gekkeikan Plum Sake
.5oz Fresh OJ
Shake all ingredients with ice and strain into a glass with ice.
Top with Ginger Beer and a piece of crystallized ginger
Anarchy in the UK-Megadeth
1.5oz J?germeister
1.5oz Plymouth Gin
1oz unsweetened iced tea
1 sugar cube
3 lemon slices
Muddle the lemon and sugar, add the iced tea and spirits and add ice. Stir and garnish with a lemon wheel.
Metal Thrashing Mad-Anthrax
1.5oz J?germeister
.5oz Appleton Estate Reserve
.5oz Domaine de Canton
.5oz Fresh Lime Juice
.5oz Fresh Orange Juice
.5oz Pineapple Juice
.5oz Raspberry Simple Syrup
Dry Shake and pour over crushed ice in a tall glass. Garnish with a mint leaf and float 2 barspoons of J?germeister over the top.
Armed and Dangerous – Anthrax
1oz Rye
1oz J?germeister
In an rocks glass, add the spirits, add the ice and top with Cola. Garnish with a lime
Fade to Black – Metallica
In a mixing glass with ice stir the following:
1.5oz of J?germeister
.5oz of Green Chartreuse
Pour into a shot glass-
Trapped Under Ice-Metallica
1.5oz Plymouth Gin
1oz J?germeister
Top with Fever Tree Tonic
Lime Wedge
Master of Puppets – Metallica
1oz Rye
1oz J?germeister
1 tsp Demarara syrup
2 dashes Jerry Thomas Bitters
Lemon Twist
Build, stir with ice, strain into cocktail glass serve with Lemon Twist
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