Twilight has stolen the limelight from Harry Potter lately, what with its excessive use of boy-nipples and all.
But that ends now. Harry Potter is about to make an impressive fightback with Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, the first part of which will be released any day now. Well, OK, not any day now. It’s still about a year off. But a year is nothing in the film world, which is why the first Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows trailer has just been released.
And then unreleased really quickly. Warner Bros has yanked all trace of it from the internet. But never fear. We’re here to help. We’re going to cobble together a reconstruction of the Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows trailer as best we can. For you…
Look, we know that what we’re about to do is stupid on so many levels. If you like Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows that much, you’ll already know what happens in it, which sort of makes the trailer redundant. Also, this is a teaser trailer for a film that won’t even be released until next November, so it’s hardly going to show anything of worth. Thirdly, we’re going to describe the Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows trailer to you instead of showing it to you, which is clearly about as much use as a cotton colostomy bag.
But shut up. We’re PUMPED UP about this! We’re going to do it! This is the closest you’re ever going to get to the Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows trailer without ever actually seeing it! This is going to be AWESOME!
Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows trailer: a faithful reconstruction…
The trailer begins with a full minute of the Harry Potter producer burbling on pointlessly about what a pleasure it was to work on the Harry Potter films. So here’s the nearest possible alternative…
The the trailer itself starts. We see a house on a beach…
Harry Potter is inside. he says “What do you know about the deathly hallows?” A pair of eyes look back at him…
What follows is a montage of unconnected images, including Severus Snape being photographed by the paparazzi…
The little chap from Willow…
And a gravestone…
Following this, Harry Potter…
Hermione…
And Ron…
Run through London…
And then a ratty old man tells Harry Potter that he’s probably going to die. Harry Potter looks sad.
No, sad.
That’s better. The end.
You’re welcome, Harry Potter fans. You’re welcome.
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Priceless!!
Fab description, I must add, I’ve never seen a sad depicted quite so eloquently before.
Oh wow.
This is epic. XD
The whole Ron = Tiffany thing made me luagh very loudly. In the middle of my college library. Where it’s really quiet.
Yeeeahhh…
this was the stupidest thing ever how could you do that to a harry potter trailer shame on whoever made this
LOL
I don`t think that was the back of Snape’s head, I think it might`ve been Jamie Campbell Bower who plays Gellert Grindelwald :]
Snape’s hair is more lanky than that. :B
BTW Grindelwald should be blonde D:
I love Harry Potter..
But I love this trailor way more
gay