Warning: this article might contains spoilers about the end of the final Harry Potter book, or possibly a lot of made-up crap – don't read it if you think it'll ruin the story; but if your life doesn't revolve around an effing kid's book, go right ahead.

With the release of Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows just one month away, speculation has never been higher amongst children and slightly creepy adults about how the book ends. Does Harry Potter die? Does Voldemort kill Harry Potter? Does Harry Potter start taking his clothes off and stabbing horses in the eyes again? Well maybe now we know – a hacker claims to have stolen an entire transcript of Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows from publishers Bloomsbury out of outrage at all the paganism that Harry Potter dabbles in. And how does Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows end? Let's just say that Hermione probably shouldn't bother making any long-term plans.

Ever since JK Rowling began work on Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, literally the most important question in the whole universe was 'Will Harry Potter die?' Some said that Harry Potter would die, others begged JK Rowling not to kill Harry Potter and most of us didn't actually care because it's just a children's book and nobody ever made this much fuss over whether Mr Tickle bought it at the end of his book.

However, JK Rowling did say that two main characters would die by the end of Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, although she wouldn't be drawn on which ones. But now we know. Sort of. Well, OK, we've got information from an anonymous source claiming to have hacked a transcript of the last Harry Potter book from a Bloomsbury computer, so it's just as likely that it was written by a non-hacker in a room full of cats on a rare break from blogging about what they had for their tea.

Even though JK Rowling asked everyone not to spoil the Harry Potter ending, the request has apparently gone ignored by a hacker named Gabriel because he claims the Pope told him to. To ruin the impact of what he calls a 'Neo Paganist' book, Gabriel revealed the following. Really, don't read this next bit if you don't potentially want the ending of the final Harry Potter book ruined, although we'll clearly think less of you if you do care that much about that sort of thing. Anyway, on this website Gabriel writes:

Dear my brothers,

Voldemort killed Hermione. Yes, that's true. And we knew that 2 days ago.

This is the end of the not yet published (someone could call that 0day) book

                Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows .

At the end of the story Hagrid was killed by Snape in the attempt of ambush Hermione and Ron.
Ron and Hermione flees in privet drive but Voldermort, surprising them, engaged a magical duel with Ron and Hermione.

Voldemort attacked trough the imperius curse and Hermione, to protect the life of Ron fight hardly for more than 6 pages and then finally die.
(boring, very boring… it's always the same story!)

Then, to make a long story short, Harry came up, killed all the bad guys and Hogwarts against became a good place to stay and have fun.

Ah, i missed one important information about Draco Malfoy, he started to create Horcrux (for fun and profit!).
The end.

So it's Hermione that bites it. At least that explains why Emma Watson wanted to leave Harry Potter a few weeks ago. And Harry Potter lives. Hooray – that'll come in handy in case none of JK Rowling's next books sell and she's forced to making a Harry Potter: Ten Years Later series. But, obviously, we shouldn't go round believing any old nonsense we find laying around on the internet. And according to Reuters, the Harry Potter publishers are already casting their aspersions about the hacker's veracity:

A Bloomsbury spokesman declined comment on the hacker's claims. Kyle Good, a spokesman for U.S. distributor Scholastic Corp., would not say whether the posting was accurate, but did warn readers to be skeptical about anything on the Web that claims to have inside information on the book's plot. "There is a whole lot of junk flying around," she said. "Consider this one more theory."

Personally we think that this supposed hacked ending to Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows is a lot of bollocks. As it happens, we too have managed to score a copy of the final Harry Potter manuscript, so we know that the book ends with Harry Potter, Ron and Hagrid all eating onion rings in a diner while an over-sincere 1980s power ballad plays in the background. As Hermione attempts to parallel park outside, a man walks into the bathroom and then suddenly everything goes black.

Oh come on, if it's good enough for Hillary Clinton…

Read more:

Hacker Claims Harry Potter's Alleged Ending On Web – Reuters