As a man most famous for advertising every single product going, George Clooney has cultivated a languidly smooth image – so we'd guess when George Clooney fell off his motorbike on Friday he did it with an arched eyebrow.
Or maybe when George Clooney fell off his motorbike he was screaming like a girl, as we suspect we would too. We just don't know. But we do know that George Clooney fell off his motorbike on Friday after being clipped by a car in New Jersey. Fortunately, though, George Clooney escaped serious harm and only managed to pick up a fractured rib while his girlfriend broke her foot. But, ever the easy-going optimist, George Clooney has turned the motorbike accident to his advantage; not only has he been approached to endorse nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory drugs in the lucrative Pacific Rim markets, but it's spurred George Clooney on to organise an all-star charity concert to raise awareness of how famous actors should get their own lanes on public highways.
It seems like George Clooney just isn't able to experience pleasure without having to deal with some kind of misery at the moment. Pleasure – George Clooney won multiple awards for his role as a fat bloke with a beard in Syriana; Pain – he also managed to fall off a chair and leak spinal fluid into his brain during its filming. Pleasure – George Clooney got voted both sexiest man alive and manliest man alive; Pain – George Clooney's pig died right afterwards. Pleasure – George Clooney's last film Ocean's Thirteen topped the weekend box office this summer. Pain – it was a bag of shit.
And this worrying trend doesn't seem to show any sign of letting up soon, because while George Clooney should be excited that Michael Clayton – his new movie that couldn't scream 'Give me an Oscar' any more if it was about a lovably disabled man from Darfur – is almost about to be unleashed on the world, he's gone and buggered it all up by stacking it off his motorbike and busting up his ribs. The Boston Herald reports:
George Clooney and his girlfriend, Sarah Larson, were injured Friday when the motorcycle they were riding was clipped by a car in New Jersey, according to several media reports. Fortunately, the Hollywood hunk and his new companion – who were both wearing helmets – managed to escape the accident with only broken bones and road rash. Clooney suffered a broken rib while Larson, 28, broke her foot, the actor’s rep, Stan Rosenfield said. “He’s doing fine,” Rosenfield said of his client… “He has a broken rib. It’s very painful and it’ll take a long time to heal.”
We know, we're just as confused as you that a celebrity has been in a traffic accident who wasn't a) young, b) female or c) carrying handfuls of cocaine in their trousers. Although it's a relief that his motorbike crash only left him with minor injuries that will easily heal in time, it hasn't stopped George Clooney and the driver of the car that collided with him bickering over whose fault the accident was. While George Clooney insists that he was minding his own business when the car ploughed into him, the car's driver – Albert Sciancaledore – maintains that George Clooney was attempting to illegally pass him on his right when the accident happened.
If George Clooney if found to be at fault for the accident there's a change he could face criminal charges, but for now let's just be thankful that george Clooney only hurt his ribs and not his face in the motorbike crash – because if George Clooney disfigured his face there'd be nobody left to advertise Martini or Nespresso or Budweiser or Nescafe or Fiat or Emidio Tucci or Toyota or South Korean whisky any more. And the vacuum left in his absence would probably bring about the end of the advertising industry as we know it. Plus there'd be less cripplingly serious movies made about dryly important subjects that people don't really enjoy watching as well. As we can't have that.
Read more:
Clooney And Girlfriend Take A Tumble In New Jersey – Boston Herald
Superpower says
Apparently his riding skills rival his acting skills.
Mike says
His girlfriend is 20 years younger… viva viagra!
john says
i’;m sorry for him, i hope he heals fast and gets better, he a nice person.