Gary Lineker Briefly Unable To Advertise Crisps

Gary Lineker - big-eared sportsman and one-time panellist on 'comedy' show They Think Its All Over - has had his latest Walkers Crisps commercial briefly pulled off the air.

Quick bit of exposition for any non-Britons reading this: Lineker is an ex-footballer who now makes a living by presenting sports programmes and - whenever he gets a spare moment - advertising packets of crisps to bewildered audiences. Many have argued that using a sporting type like Lineker to flog junk food might be a bit hypocritical, but they need to lighten up - the whole shebang has been pretty much commonplace ever since Muhammed Ali advertised Doritos, yelling to camera: "You know, when I'm not reflecting on my epic career, I like nothing more than to shovel handfuls of additive-coated corn snacks into my eager boxer's mouth."

He did need someone else to open the bags, mind.

Anyway. Gary Lineker's latest campaign has touched on something of a sore spot. What with Britain going through a flood crisis of biblical proportions, Walkers has realised that it may have been a tad insensitive to broadcast a commercial in which:

…the BBC sports presenter [is] singing and dancing in the rain with potato farmers - getting his suit splattered with mud from the tractors.

It could be as ill-advised as the time Ricky Gervais performed Free Love On The Free Love Freeway (lyrics: 'she's dead') at the Princess Diana Memorial Concert. Or that time hecklerspray ignored those warnings about letting our toddler nephew play with next door's tanning bed. Boy oh boy - we were still getting bitched at seven skin-grafts later.

Thankfully, Walkers has been all gentle and benevolent and postponed the advert, telling the world:

 "We didn't think it would be appropriate during the current crisis."

Good on 'em, we suppose. Hopefully when they do show the commercial later in the year, there'll have been a few changes - like Gary Lineker moaning about the lack of sandbags provided by the local council, or Gary Lineker chipping in with the town locals to clear up the damage caused by the floodwaters.

Or maybe just Gary Lineker throwing a packet of Smoky Bacon crisps to one side, shouting "By Christ, these are pissing disgusting," and holding the entire camera crew at gunpoint until Walkers agrees to start making that lovely Worcester Sauce flavour again. Either that or he could dress up as an alien and start advertising Space Raiders.

With those ears? Two minutes in make-up, tops.

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Lineker Ad on Hold - Mirror