Free New Crap = a happy place where we find a single free legal download each week and pretend that it's enough to make you less miserable about being dumped by your boyfriend and having a terrible job that you hate – in a good way!

Uh-oh – we've got a touch of the Hasselhoffs coming on. You know how you're never truly sure how much David Hasselhoff gets that people only like him ironically and are never certain about how seriously he takes himself? Well that's the exact way we feel about Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra.

At first glance Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra is a horribly naff song that sounds like Mack The Knife being used as the soundtrack to a 1950s documentary about a milk bottling station. It's the sort of thing you hear blaring out of open nursing home windows. Then you start to take a closer look at Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra and realise that, from a distance, it sounds like something from a cool Irma La Douche compilation of old Italian library recordings, right down to the last "ba-ba-ba," and that, actually, Danka Shoen is kinda swinging. Then there's the cover to the album housing Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra, entitled There's No Place Like London! Everything – everything – about it smells of irony, from the colour scheme to the font to good old Tony Evans himself. Warning - Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra is going to grow on you, and you may not like yourself for it.

Download Danke Schoen by Tony Evans And His Orchestra