Eva Mendes doesn't love animals as much as a normal person does, you know – Eva Mendes loves animals so much that she's compelled to get her bum out for them quite a lot.
Animal rights group PETA has just revealed Ghost Rider star Eva Mendes as the latest face, spine and bare arse of its 'I'd Rather Go Naked Than Wear Fur' campaign, in an effort to show the world how foolish and disgusting people who do wear fur-based clothing are. So – on the basis that Eva Mendes will stop being naked when the inhumane fur trade realises how cruel and irresponsible it's being – we're going to outside, chop up a monkey with a pair of scissors and turn it into a nice pair of furry slacks.
When Eva Mendes was at her very first movie premiere, her stylist sent her big fur wrap that we believe was made of a mixture of Lassie, Benji, Black Beauty and the hairiest parts of Free Willy. This, like most things, got animal rights group PETA all narked off, and they sent Eva Mendes a letter telling her what a gigantic bitch she was being.
Eva Mendes learnt her lesson there and then, and a beautiful friendship was struck up between the actress and the red-eyed animal-protectors. Now, several years later, Eva Mendes has decided to repay the compliment by taking off her blouse and covering up her boobies with her hands. For the animals.
Following similar campaigns by Alicia Silverstone and Sadie Frost, Eva Mendes has become the latest star to try and encourage people to wear less fur by going naked. It's thought that Eva's naked campaign will be more successful than the others because – unlike Alicia Silverstone – people have heard of her, and – unlike Sadie Frost – people don't dislike her so much that they'll skin a chinchilla just to spite her.
But just how much does Eva Mendes love animals? Quite a bloody lot as it happens, because in the accompanying PETA Q&A, Eva reveals all. Emotionally, that is. We're not talking about her tits this time:
"We Own The Night is a crime thriller set in the late 1980s about two brothers on opposite sides of the law. I play the girlfriend of Joaquin Phoenix, a manager for a club involved with the Russian Mafia, whose brother (played by Mark Wahlberg) is a cop targeting the Mafia for drug involvement. It's a great cast, and it was such a thrill to play opposite actors like Joaquin, Mark, and Robert Duvall."
No, wait, that's the part of the PETA Q&A where Eva Mendes shamelessly promotes her new film. Oh well, there's another bit in it where she says faux fur is quite good. Trust us.
And if you think Eva Mendes loves animals a lot now, just wait until you see her in We Own The Night – she actually puts her fingers in her fanny right at the beginning. For the animals.
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Super Amanda says
Oh please as long as Eva shuts up about how ‘ample her curves are’ and her ‘large bust’ then I’ll listen to her. Eva thinks she resembles Sophia Loren? Well a beady eyed right wing Cuban who barely registers BCup is NEVER going to cut it as Sophia Loren the Goddess of Italy beauty and Amazonian 38-24-38 perfection. Eva needs to wake up and stop lying to the media claiming she is bodacious in that tall hourglass tradition, she’s not-her tits and ass are way too small and narrow to qualify- thsi photo proves it. maybe compared to mary kate and Ashley but not Sophia or even Tyra banks. She’s tiny tots.
Dave says
Stop taking the mick out of her, you know you would given half a chance, and you’d be pleased!