Now that Easter is over and you're stuffed to the wazoo with low-rent chocolate eggs, you need to get back into the swing of things, and what better way to do that than by financially benefiting from the lousiness of the UK Eurovision entry?

This time next week we'll be chucking Eurovision betting odds to win at you like a gang of deranged sequin-obsessed numbskulls, but until then you'll have to make do with these special Eurovision betting odds – and you'll like them too, because they're all about Scooch being terrible. And, make no mistake, Scooch are terrible. But how terrible? Nil Points terrible? Let's see, shall we?

Here are the Eurovision betting odds for Flying The Flag by Scooch to get Nil Points at Eurovision, with help from Paddy Power…

UK to get Nil Points at this year's Eurovision final – It wasn't so long ago that the UK got nil points at Eurovision – thanks to Jemini's bastard-awful off-key rendition of whatever song it was they were trying to squeeze out – so it'd be a genuine national embarrassment if the UK somehow got nil points again this year. And it wouldn't normally be a worry, except for the fact that the UK's Eurovision entry this year is so utterly terrible that we can't help feeling it's somewhat inevitable. In a just world Scooch wouldn't only get nil points at Eurovision for Flying The Flag, they'd also be run through with forklift trucks and driven into an active volcano. In fact, we're going to go ahead and just warn Europe that if any country even gives Scooch a solitary point at Eurovision in May, we'll lose all respect for it. At first we were staggered that this betting market still had outlandishly long odds – but then we remembered that some countries seemed to like Daz Sampson's miserable attempt at a song last year, and Flying The Flag seems like effing Stockhausen compared to that. Current Eurovision betting odds – 12/1 

Tomorrow - Dropsy Dervish? But if that's too long to wait – or you feel like making more money than you know what to do with – head right over to the Paddy Power Eurovision betting odds page to see the latest, and best, betting odds.