Eurovision Betting Odds 2007: Lithuania & Malta

Day nine billion of our Eurovision betting odds, and we've got some exciting news; we're going to be liveblogging the Eurovision Song Contest again - come here on the evening on Saturday May 12 and we can all be pathetic together, OK?

Have you ever wondered what to get the Eurovision fan who has everything - other than a noose, a shotgun and some anthrax-coated razorblades? Well why not buy them the official Eurovision 2007 Fan Book? At over 100 pages long, the Eurovision 2007 Fan Book contains all the lyrics for all of this year's songs, a look back at the Athens Eurovision Song Contest of 2006 and an outline of this year's interval acts. "It's like a beutiful picture-book with fairytales" says Davor Perjic from Bosnia. Genuinely.

Here are today's Eurovision betting odds - for Lithuania and Malta - with help from Paddy Power…

Lithuania (pop. 3,607,899; a republic in northeastern Europe) 4Fun, Love Or Leave

It's an undeniable fact that last year's Lithuanian Eurovision entry - We Are The Winners - wasn't just one of the best Eurovision songs ever, or one of the best songs ever, but the best noise that planet Earth has ever created. We have it on our iPod. Seriously. How the hell were Lithuania ever going to beat a hulking slab of genius like that? With the power of slickly-smooth George Michael-esque Spanish-sounding wine bar muzak, that's how. Love Or Leave by 4Fun is so thoroughly vapid that it hardly even exists. It's basically like the dullest Sade track you've ever heard, about a woman who's upset that everyone she shags runs away before she wakes up: "I'm trying not to think/ That at break of dawn/ You'll be gone and I'll be lost, numb and all alone" she sings, not realising that the men all think she's a tedious cow. The biggest Eurovision disappointment of the year. Current Eurovision betting odds - 80/1

Malta (pop. 399,867; a small and densely populated island nation in Southern Europe) Olivia Lewis, Vertigo

Judging by all the comments that we got from Maltese people last year, Eurovision is a very big thing in Malta. So Maltese people look away now… your song is crap. It's a shame really, since Olivia Lewis has a voice so powerful that she'd crush your ribcage with it if she pointed her mouth at your chest from 50 paces, but the song Vertigo is just completely without merit. It's a sort of pretend-Eastern ballad - roughly the 29th we've covered so far this year - and it's all about how she loves someone so much she sweats, gets ball-ache and a nosebleed whenever she sees him. "You're spinning me round/ And you're holding me down/ Loving you gives me vertigo" she sings. Serves her right for falling in love with one of those travelling fairground gypsies then, doesn't it. Current Eurovision betting odds - 25/1

Tomorrow - Moldova and Montenegro Eurovision betting odds. But if that's too long to wait - or you feel like making more money than you know what to do with - head right over to the Paddy Power Eurovision betting odds page to see the latest, and best, betting odds.