Holy crap, do we ever love the Eurovision Song Contest. We love it so much that we’re lobbying Brussels decide the outcomes to all wars with Eurovision Song Contests, since we figure that’s the quickest way to turn an entire continent into a nuclear wasteland.

Before we hold you down and fill you full of Eurovision betting odds, we have some big news about UK Eurovision hopefuls Scooch – they’ve been signed by a record label and their godawful Flying The Flag song is going to be released next month. But the really exciting thing is that the b-side of the single is going to be a karaoke version! That means that your children or any infant relative of yours has the chance to read the words “Would Sir like something to suck on?” on a big screen backed by cheap-sounding Europop. Finally!

Anyway, here comes today’s Eurovision betting odds – for Bosnia & Herzegovina and Bulgaria – with help from Paddy Power…

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