Here we go again, it’s time for another thump of Eurovision 2009 profiles.

We’re so close to the Eurovision Song Contest now that we can give you actual news about the contest instead of filling this space up with meaningless facts and unimportant figures. So here’s today’s Eurovision news – the lighting for the contest has started to be built into the Olympiyski Indoor Arena. Whew, that’s some news. We wonder if tomorrow’s news will be able to top that?

In the meantime, here’s the Eurovision 2009 profile for Igor Cukrov and Andrea Šušnjara from Croatia…

Croatia · Igor Cukrov and Andrea Šušnjara, Lijepa Tena

Croatia have an absurdly inconsistent Eurovision technique that means one year they’ll enter an amateur pornstar, the next a rapping grandfather and the next a bag of dreary old tripe like Lijepa Tena. Performed by a Croatian Fame Academy finalist and a pretty girl whose microphone has been turned down so low that she may as well just be a placard with the word ‘tits’ on it, Lijepa Tena is exactly the sort of tuneless, mid-paced dirge that’ll get completely swallowed up by all the other Eurovision entries. In fact, we’ll go as far as to say that the only hope that Igor Cukrov and Andrea Šušnjara have of even getting past the Eurovision semi-final stage is if Croatia either a) threatens some military strong-arming or b) withholds the right to let anyone go there on holiday next year. It really is a very charming holiday destination, we heard.

Tomorrow – Cyprus!

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