Enchanted Enchants 50% Less Of Weekend Box Office

Now that it's into its second week on top of the US weekend box office, pundits are starting to call Enchanted the best Disney movie for years - and that's fighting talk for Brother Bear fanatics everywhere. Both of them.

But Enchanted's second week on top of the US weekend box office probably hasn't got that much to with how brilliant it is, rather it's an indication of how crap all the new movies that came out on Friday are. For example, would you rather watch Enchanted or a rubbish-looking film about Jessica Alba having it off with some bloke in a bath? Why, Enchanted of cour… what? Wait. People are dumb.

Enchanted is still the top movie at the weekend box office, following last week's sterling effort. Even though the weekend box office gross is 50% less than last week's, it's not difficult to see why Enchanted is proving to be such a hit. It's clear that by copying Shrek-style subversive humour, Enchanted has gone down a storm with moviegoers everywhere. So let's hope that Enchanted also copies Shrek's sequel policy, because the world is crying out for Enchanted 2, Enchanted The Third, Enchanted Goes Fourth, the Enchanted Christmas special, Enchanted: Smash And Crash Racing, Enchanted 4D and Enchanted in the Swamp Karaoke Dance Party. It is crying out for all of those things. Here's this week's US weekend box office top five…

1 - Enchanted (People are already calling Susan Sarandon's performance in Enchanted as Queen Narcissa her most blood-curdling since her turn in last year's Irresistible, but they're wrong. And if you've also been unlucky enough to have seen Irresistible, well, we're frankly surprised that you haven't tried burning your face off at the sheer futility of it all) $17,023,000

2 - This Christmas (Maybe This Christmas will go down in history alongside White Christmas and It's A Wonderful Life as a must-see Christmas movie. After all, there's nothing we like after eating a big Christmas dinner than watching a bunch of sub-Tyler Perry idiots discuss their emotional problems like they're reading Chicken Soup For The Soul off an autocue. No, our mistake, there's everything we like more than that) $8,400,000

3 - Beowulf (Such is the success of Beowulf that naked computerised Angelina Jolie has decided to do her own thing and start making painfully unpopular serious-minded movies about the emotional impact of war too, meaning that in the future a computerised version of the computerised version of Angelina Jolie will be needed to remind people that they only like Angelina Jolie when she's naked) $7,882,200

4 - Awake (Following The Fantastic Four 2 and Good Luck Chuck, this is further proof that Jessica Alba is getting more and more artistically bankrupt. We should be sad, but in fact this is a time for celebration - Awake's underperformance at the weekend box office has shortened the time before Jessica Alba commits herself solely to starring in erotic thrillers by anything up to 18 months) $6,011,000

5 - Hitman (A film charting the disastrous solo career of Pete Waterman after he split up with his professional nightclub-touring partner Michaela Strachan) $5,800,000

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Weekend Box Office - Box Office Mojo