Good news! Eminem is back with a brand new album that everybody is really trying very hard to like.
Better news! Eminem’s new single is called Love The Way You Lie and Rihanna sings the chorus on it. Best news! Despite Rihanna’s very public struggles with domestic violence, the video to Love The Way You Lie is largely about Megan Fox and Charlie from Lost beating each other up. How brilliant is that? It’s like Rihanna is totally using the video as a cathartic method of release. Or she’s cashing in on the fact that her boyfriend beat her to the brink of unconsciousness last year. Or she’s saying that domestic violence is wonderful.
To be honest, we’ve lost the ability to tell. But you know what’ll sort that out? A good old decoding of the Eminem and Rihanna Love The Way You Lie video. After the jump, everyone…
First, here’s the Eminem and Rihanna Love The Way You Lie video in full…
Did you watch it? All the way through? No, us neither. We’re busy people and, to be honest, the song isn’t very good. But what’s all this with Megan Fox and Charlie from Lost? There’s only one thing for it – we need to break this story down into pieces.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 1
Look, it’s Megan Fox and Charlie from Lost. They are evidently quite in love. This should be a beautiful, beautiful video and no mistake.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 2
But oh no! Although Charlie may have saved the lives of all his Lost friends by writing on his hand, this time he’s spectacularly bodged up his relationship with Megan Fox by doing the exact same thing. Remember Charlie, ‘Not Penny’s Boat’ good, ‘Cindy 555 0936’ bad. But let’s not leap to conclusions here – for all we know Cindy is Charlie’s sister or the woman who provides him with protective eyewear.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 3
OK, it’s obviously not the eyewear thing. If that’s who Cindy was then Charlie would have been prepared for Megan Fox’s furious spit attack. But alas, she gobbed right into his mush. This doesn’t look very hopeful.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 4
Uh-oh. Now Megan Fox has hit Charlie. This is ominous. God knows how Charlie will react to this.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 5
HOLY MOTHER OF CHRIST! HE’S EATING HER! HE’S ACTUALLY BLOODY EATING HER ALIVE! THIS IS APPALLING! SOMEONE STOP THIS ATROCITY!
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 6
Incidentally, if anyone was wondering where Eminem is while this nightmare is playing out, he’s in a field. Again, he’s in a field.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 7
But back to the story. Here we can see Charlie, consumed with guilt after eating Megan Fox alive, attempt to cough her back up like a hairball. This will be an easy feat to accomplish because, as everyone knows, Megan Fox is small than the width of Charlie from Lost‘s oesophagus, and also Charlie has the gastrointestinal system of a small domesticated animal.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 8
“Sorry I cheated on you, ate you alive and then coughed you back up, Megan Fox.”
“That’s OK, Charlie from Lost.”
“By the way, while I was coughing you up I accidentally shat out this teddy bear. Would you like it?”
“Yes please.”
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 9
Oh, now Charlie from Lost has punched Megan Fox in the face. Didn’t see that coming.
LOVE THE WAY YOU LIE VIDEO SCENE 10
And now Charlie has set himself on fire. Well, this seems to follow the basic pattern of domestic violence – mistrust, physical violence, cannibalisation, regurgitation, teddy-shitting, more physical violence and then spontaneous human combustion. Well done to Rihanna for pointing this out to us.
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Sarah says
Great video!Good job!
maumau says
is someone trying real hard to discredit the genius and power to assemble those three for a music video on such a topic?sometimes its not about the cars,clothes and ice.
asid says
Classic Song..classic video
one of the finest rap albums of the last 10 years
Eminem is the highest selling artist of this century , did you know? Uh , No . Doesn’t sound like it after reading your article . In case you’re not deaf , the lyrics describe the pain and confusion one goes through in such a relationship .
Jamarcus says
Whoever wrote this is obviosly an eminem hater. The two million people who downloaded this song and 1.98 million people who bought this album so far will read this bogus article and laugh. Hey Stuart, no one has to try and love his album. STOP HAITING.
OST says
This is a great video. It is so real and full of emotion.
Michm says
You’re critique of this song is moronic.
kefid crusher says
GOOD!!!!
Ha says
Hey , whoever wrote this article is a dickhead who never went through a troubled relationship, and has no idea about hip hop.. Stupid son of a Bitch !
Ginamon says
Teddy-Shitting was pretty funny… look forward to more… thanks!
Irene says
Impressive work!
bianca says
the video is good.I love the hiphop keep up.
Jackie says
Dont you think its more a slap in the face of reality….
If you are in a relationship like that dont you think…..
That its clear you cant hide it and you have to see them go to bed together after….and when they do…something inside all of us dies…and yet we all understand it..
Because almost all people, have been there and done that.
Eminem is a metophorical rapper, a di-vinci code…there is
always a different meaning, if you choose to see real life issues that are usually swept under the rug…if you choose to see that as some form of saying domestic violence is okay.
That isnt the message.
watch the video a few more times.
Its art and there is alot of strength in this.
Its about exposing the cycle.
Cyberience says
The point is that the song is using a sarcastic approach to bring up a strong message, for example, does a person really liked to be lied to or beaten up?
And its interesting that woman are very good at this kind of argument too but thats a different story.
erwtyujku says
you’re ignorant.
lyn says
no offense, but seriously, u don’t know shit about domsetic violence & what goes on within those relationships… both the song & video speak volumes to me & i’m a victim of domestic violence. you’ll never have a clue what i feels like to walk a mile in my shoes or those of my abuser. i can’t tell you how hard the lyrics strike me as i listen. when eminem says “don’t you hear sincerity in MY VOICE WHEN I TALK?!” and his pitch goes up just that much it raises the hairs on the back of my neck… you can feel his frustration ready to burst & it’s chilling… at the end when he says if she ever leaves again he’s going to tie her to the bed & set the house on fire, i can actually see something very similar to what would have been the end result of my situation had i not finally had too many close calls & had him arrested. basically everything in that song hit me like a ton of bricks. it was like he knew me & my ex personally & was rapping about us. you have no idea what rhianna went thru, so shame on you for judging!!!
just the opinion of someone who’s been there. take it for what it’s worth…
mark says
1st off, hilarious interpretation. i must say the best part was the dialogue. i mean, holy shit! charlies an effing zombie! omm-nom-nom! LOVED IT! and for all the hater, you hate because you fail to see the comidic genius in this revue. christ, i’ve read dozens of revues for this vid and they all say the exact same thing: chris brown beat up rihanna & eminem beat up kim, so now the guy from lost is beating up/ sexin up megan fox, and blah, blah, blah. its all inoriginal but you shit to someone who is original in his revue? F%^ YOU! kudos stuart for having a sense of humor
glee music says
I am overwhelmed by the thought, the engineering, the fitting-it-in around the relaxation of every thing else I need to do as Chief Cook and Bottle Washer in my enterprise
iwaa says
. . . I’ts my st0ri, ;'( // i LOVE this s0ng . . . <3
EminemLover says
Stop hating on Eminem and the music video. Charlie’s the cutest guy in the world, Megan’s hot, Eminem and Rihanna have amazing talent, so I think you need to think twice before criticizing a really good video.