Looks like Elizabeth Hurley is better at getting married than she is at acting; although if her wedding was anywhere close to being as bad as her acting, the church would probably fall down and the congregation would get attacked by angry ducks.
But that isn't to say that Elizabeth Hurley is unwilling to give it a shot – it's reported that she's planning to marry Arun Nayar "very soon." You hear that? Elizabeth Hurley is going to get married to a bloke she's probably been engaged to for a few years. Now if that isn't news we're not sure what is.
All through the 1990s, Elizabeth Hurley was the most famous Hurley in the universe, for going out with that stuttering fop from Four Weddings And A Funeral and only wearing clothes made from 3mm of fabric and a safety pin. But recently Elizabeth Hurley has been displaced as Most Famous Hurley by the fact guy from Lost, and that has to sting. And it's not as if Elizabeth Hurley can get more famous by acting in films; for one, starring in anything with Dennis Leary is like an official confirmation of career death, and secondly Elizabeth Hurley can act as well as we can fire robot seagulls out of our hairy arses when we shit.
So the only ways that Elizabeth Hurley can keep her fame reservoir topped-up are by presenting that fashion programme – even though she apparently needs cuecards to remind her what emotion to show – and by her personal life. This, if anything, is where Elizabeth Hurley excels. Remember when everyone thought that Elizabeth Hurley was pregnant, when really she was just getting a bit fat? Or when Elizabeth Hurley refused to go to India because it makes her vomit? That's the stuff she's good at. And she's at it again.
Elizabeth Hurley has been with Indian businessman Arun Nayar for a few years now, and it finally looks like she's going to march him up the aisle any second now, as she told Vanity Fair, the magazine still pleased with itself for revealing that Kate Moss has some nice clothes:
"I can't reveal the date, but it's very close. And we are also thinking of having a child."
So, in summation, Elizabeth Hurley – a bad actress who hasn't really been famous for a while – is marrying a man who's primarily well-known for going out with Elizabeth Hurley. And now, with your lives enriched, you can continue with your lives.
[story by Stuart Heritage]