Think of Donald Trump and you think success. Well, no, actually you think of a bellowing nitwit with the world’s worst haircut.
But then you think success. And that’s why today’s news must be incredibly humiliating for Donald Trump – the casino firm that bears his name has filed for bankruptcy.
Still, Donald Trump has absolved himself of any responsibility in the demise of his casinos, and the next Apprentice season will carry on as normal, with a group of hard-nosed businessmen fighting for the chance to sell stolen DVD players from the boot of Trump’s car in a B&Q carpark.
It’s probably fair to say that the recession has hit the world harder than anybody can imagine. Business are going under, families are losing their homes and – perhaps worst of all – that Isla Fisher movie about the woman who spends a lot of money only got to number four in the weekend box office. It’s a disaster.
One person likely to feel the effects of the recession more than anyone else, though, is Donald Trump. Not only is he in charge of a gigantic real estate company in a time when people can barely afford to eat, let alone buy massive apartments covered in gold; but he’s also in charge of The Apprentice, a show which promotes exactly the sort of ruthless risk-taking that got us all into this fix in the first place.
Also, we don’t even want to go into all the nightmarish things that’ll happen to Donald Trump’s head should the hair-care industry go under. We come out in hives just thinking about it.
And Donald Trump is already beginning to feel the chill, because one of the businesses operating under his name – casino firm Trump Entertainment Resorts, of which Trump owns 28% – has just filed for bankruptcy after missing a $53 million interest payment on its $1.7 billion debt.
News like this would usually leave egg all over the public face of the company, but not Donald Trump. That’s partly because his fringe shutters down like a riot shield any time it senses egg-proximity, and partly because Donald Trump wants everyone to know that the Trump Entertainment Resorts bankruptcy is definitely not his fault. The Financial Times reports:
In a stinging statement released last week following his resignation from the board, Mr Trump laid the blame for the group?s demise squarely on the bondholders. He accused their representatives of making ?a series of bad decisions? and said they had ?encouraged wasteful spending, which has led to severe problems with the company?.
It’s a relief that Donald Trump wasn’t in control of Trump Entertainment Resorts as it went under, because being in charge of a failing casino – the only business where you’re allowed to smash peoples’ knees in with a baseball bat if you start to make a loss – at a time when there should be lines of people grimly pumping their remaining few dollars into a machine in the desperate hope that it’ll pay out enough for them to feed their family would be massively embarrassing.
Not as embarrassing as that haircut, mind you, but it’d be close.
Powerball PA says
and for him, this is nothing
magnetite says
He is truly one of the world’s most constipated looking men. They should sell postcards of him instead of Immodium. One look at that mug and you’d dry up faster than one of the zombies in the 1985 sci-fi and excuse-for-nudity flick Lifeforce.
Yeah. Those ones.