Although the public image of Donald Trump is that of an overbearing oaf with too much money, not enough humility and a haircut that looks as if it was stolen from a self-consciously balding orangutan, maybe the birth of Donald Trumps's first grandchild will change that.

Donald Trump's son Donald Trump Jr and his wife Vanessa have just welcomed their first child, a baby girl named Kai Madison, into the world. We expect that Donald Trump will be the model grandfather to baby Kai and ensure that she never wants for anything. Of course, that is unless Kai ever grows up to get a job on The View, in which case we can presume that Pappy Donald will post a five-minute-long relentless abuse-filled video addressed to her on YouTube. Or, at the very least, try to sue her to smithereens.

Donald Trump didn't get where he is today by not being down with the kids. Oh wait, that's not right – Donald Trump got where he is by having a successful father, being a shameless self-publicist and then getting lucky on a TV show where all he's required to do is jab his finger around and arbitrarily sack someone once a week. But despite this Donald Trump is also partially down with some of the kids.

Those kids include all the young authors that Donald Trump has tried to sue for billions of dollars, all the sex, drug and alcohol-addicted beauty queens that he decides not to sack and all of his own children, including Donald Trump Jr – the man who has helped produce Kai Madison Trump, Donald Trump's first grandchild, just one year after Donald Trump had his own baby. People reports the details:

Donald Trump Jr. and wife Vanessa, both 29, welcomed their first child Saturday afternoon in New York City, the couple told PEOPLE. The 6-lb. 14-oz. girl, named Kai Madison, joins uncle Barron, The Donald's own 1-year-old son with wife Melania, among the youngest Trumps. "Everyone's great," Trump Jr. said in a phone call from the hospital. "Baby's great, Vanessa's great – and I'm getting used to the idea."

Already Donald Trump has big plans for baby Kai. She's pencilled into replace the replacement of Donald Trump's fired uptight crony as a new sidekick on the next season of the increasingly desperate The Apprentice, subtitled You've Been Fired By A Fucking Baby, Dickwad. And also, just to maintain the theme of family ownership, Donald's christening gift to Kai is a 20-foot-tall marble sign of the word 'TRUMP' that will be welded to the baby's forehead at the first opportunity.

Oh we're just kidding. Donald Trump is bound to be a wonderful grandfather to baby Kai Madison, and we can see him reading bedtime stories to the tot – most probably passages from Trump: How To Get Rich, Trump: The Art Of The Deal, Trump: Think Like a Billionaire: Everything You Need to Know About Success, Real Estate, and Life or the soon-to-be published Trump: Did I Ever Tell You About The Time I Called Rosie O'Donnell A Disgusting Truck Driver Slob Loser? Because I Totally Did All Of That.

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It's A Girl For Donald Trump Jr And Wife Vanessa – People