Doctor Who Fans Are Irritating People Who Need To Shut Up

Logo for the BBC show, Doctor Who

Where does “timey-wimey” and “spacey-wacey” come from? If you guessed something that starts with “drunk,” then I applaud you for your logic. If you guessed Doctor Who, then you’re also correct and have some sort of knowledge of what a Doctor Who is. And for that, I hate you.

I don’t hate Doctor Who. I just hate you. And by you, I mean that terrible few of you.

Maybe it’s the haircut that the current Doctor has. That ridiculous swoosh that makes me wish every nerve center was located in the tip of the follicles, just so punching a haircut would be more effective. Or maybe it’s all the gifs that I see. I haven’t seen a lot of the show, but thanks to images put together in short format, I know for sure that it’s got this weird, quotable anti-humor that geeks can easily latch onto.

I’m not saying that I’m not a geek. And I know that geeks, when they enjoy something, will literally beat it into oblivion. I didn’t used to hate Monty Python and The Holy Grail, but my 11th grade theatre class ruined it for me, with multiple re-enactments of the holy hand grenade scene. If one more loud kid said “We’re the Knights who say Ni!” to me as if I was going to continue with what would eventually lead to all seven levels of embarrassment, I would have renounced comedy as a whole and stuck to eventually looking for plot holes in the The Avengers, which is what a humorless lifestyle inevitably leads to.

I have a powerful feeling that I’ve been exposed to more Doctor Who than most Doctor Who fans. I’ve watched a few episodes, and I just can’t seem to enjoy it. I’m not saying that it’s bad, but its low-budget goofiness mixed with that annoying British “look at how witty this response is in this context but God knows us fans will try to shove it into something else” charm that I mentioned geeks latching onto so much, just turns me off.

A sonic screwdriver from Doctor Who

Popular wishlist item for people I’d never hang out with.

I understand that the Dalek is supposed to be a threat, but it looks like it came out of a storage closet containing every rejected invention patent from 1972. And since all the sci-fi sets literally look like the designer was asked to replicate the Enterprise’s basement, it breaks my suspension of disbelief cleanly in two, with both halves being equally baffled by the show’s ridiculousness.

People go nuts about this kind of thing, and there’s no way to describe Doctor Who in a way that doesn’t sound like the way I’d describe it if I was making fun of it. Asking people to defend it’s merits is like asking a friend to explain an in-joke they had with someone who’s recently deceased: a bunch of stammering about how I need to have a certain taste to enjoy it, and shame.

A lot of my friends like it, and I’m not dissing them. I hate you, trust me. I also hate your tumblr, because that’s where most of my rage in the present is imported from. The reblogging of sheer insanity that is tumblr.

Thanks to tumblr, I get unnaturally angry at something stupid at least twice a day. And, when I started writing this article, I was particularly angry at Doctor Who. Doctor Who fans can’t express their joy in portions or in respectable fashions. They feel the need to partake in this popular expression of excitement where they start typing and end up with a bunch of random letters, because, thanks to the internet, random letters is the new black. It’s hilarious!

“Oh my god check out my mini tardis it’s so cool i cant even dhsdjhdiodhaiohd”

It’s either this, or this weird emotional connection that some fans display, where they’re “not okay” with stuff that happens, as seen here:

‘After last night, I’m not okay. I loved Rose, and I cried when she left. I was brokenhearted when Donna left—but the way Amy and Rory left…I’m just not okay.’

I see this reaction a lot in certain shows, where people decide that a couple shouldn’t have formed or a specific, fictional character shouldn’t have died. Why? Does it ruin the story? Does it hurt the show?

Usually not. The fan just isn’t “okay” with it. I’ve had visceral reactions to television before, but I’m usually “okay” with the decisions that the writers and directors make because I don’t live in the same universe as the characters, and never will. Therefore, when something happens that I don’t like, I usually just say “I don’t like that choice.” But I’m completely “okay” with it. Some Doctor Who fans are never “okay” with anything they disagree with. I can’t get into the mindset of a person with that amount of devotion. And, considering how crazy it sounds, neither can they.

Matt Smith as Doctor Who

Can we go back to his hair for a second? It’s like he’s genetically engineered for me to hate him.

‘I think Amy should have smiled when she threw her last look at the Doctor, because the desperate “goodbye” she blurted out upset him more than necessary’

The source of that? Tumblr. A person who lacks the ability to ever become real was upset more than necessary. Is this really the kind of people that exist on the planet? People who are sad when a costume change acts upset? I know that all Doctor Who fans aren’t like this, because BBC would be shut down for putting excessive lead in water mains if they were, but a handful of Doctor Who fans are ruining seeing Doctor Who fans for me.

In short, the annoying fans really just make me want to jlkj;lhj;oihjn;nnikn like i don’t even

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Comments

  1. Kayla says

    So you hate something others like. (and by something I mean the myriad of things you mentioned which is apparently doctor who fans, tumblr, fangirls, and apparently anyone who breathes and isn’t you.) What do you want a cookie?

  2. Ellie says

    Hilarious. But you’re pretty much describing every teenager/obsessed fan of anything out there, from sports to vintage Converse shoelaces.

  3. Anon. says

    Good for you. You have an opinion. But just because you have one doesn’t mean to need to tell the world about it. There are plenty of shows I do not like, but I keep that to myself so I do not offend people. I do not go posting about it on a website called Hecklerspray.com. I’m not saying you need to take back what you said, but do think about, I don’t know, using your brain to avoid Doctor Who fans if they are so irritating. Writing an article about how annoying they are is not going to help you out any there. If you don’t like the Tumblr fans, don’t go on Tumblr. If you don’t want to be part of it, don’t watch any form of BBC One.

    Now that I have given you some insightful advice, I do hope that you have a wonderful life. Take care.

  4. Varda says

    Just don’t look at DW web sites, fanpages, friends, etc. Ask them politely about you don’t want to listen about the show and that’s it.. You don’t have to like the show.

  5. Wendon says

    Writers who self-profess to have “not really watched” a show but still insist on writing highly opinionated and generally uninformed articles “are irritating and need to shut up.”

  6. Joe says

    I really think this was unnecessary. Constantly saying “I hate you” is rude. You might not like the show, but people do. There are a lot of things that have really really dedicated fans. Like Harry Potter, Star Wars, etc. The show is very quotable, that’s why you see quotes everywhere. And if you don’t like seeing the stuff on Tumblr I think you should install Tumblr Saviour so you can blacklist Doctor Who.

  7. Andrew says

    Daniel you are way too judgmental, you are rude, irritable, hateful and you are making generalizations based on a stereotype. In short this article reveals a lot about you. You are a rude, angry jerk who probably has no friends and no family who talks to you. You have issues you need to deal with. Go see a therapist.

  8. says

    You are getting upset over the fact that a show has loyal fans. Frankly I think you are more upset then any fan that wasn’t ‘okay’ with Amy or Rory leaving. I’m pretty sure you get upset over something. It could be CoD, Gears, or what-ever you are into (maybe that weed you smoked sucked auighjkgmgnjkf :( ).

    Without emotions how can we call ourselves human. Sure some fans get way into it to a point of wanting to face smack them. But others of us just like the witty British humor and fantasy. Surely there are some things in Star Trek or Star Wars that you couldn’t explain clearly without sounding like you had an illness. But you like it because YOU like it and should I hate you because hearing about Bobba Fett grates on my every last nerve? No.

    You know how to simply describe Doctor Who? It’s not about witty British humor. Or about Daleks – which WERE made on a very low budget in the 60s. It’s about loving and accepting everyone for who they are. It’s about you being you and me being me and not hating each other for it. Hate is such a strong word. It should never be used lightly as you have.

    But being a Whovian I forgive you for the insult. I accept you as you are and I hope that you can find something that makes you happy in life. :)

    ~ The Doctor

  9. John Q. Public says

    If you don’t like the show then don’t watch it you obnoxious moron. I can’t stand “Grey’s Anatomy”, but do I write an article about it? No, I simply don’t watch it and go on about my life without feeling the need to make an ass of myself like you just did.

  10. Terri says

    Agreed!!
    Doctor Who is fun and I love it. I love getting caught up in the storylines, applauding when the writers “get it right”, and sharing my righteous indignation with other Whovians when the writers “get it wrong”. It’s just fun. Isn’t enough of life serious? What’s wrong with people just enjoying a show that gives them some pleasure? And if they like to post about it on Tumblr, Facebook, Twitter, or anywhere else, where is the harm?? And if the writer doesn’t like seeing those posts…HE DOESN’T HAVE TO LOOK AT THEM…the posts aren’t meant for him anyway, they’re meant for other fans.

    I just get annoyed by people who go out of their way to find something that irritates them, then “wittily” griping about it.

  11. Nick says

    Wow, you’re an idiot. I mean, you’re obviously not going to get any love from DW fans EVER so instead you insult them. All these other people have said better points, but basically from me, this is my advice.
    Get laid.

  12. some guy says

    Okay so obviously anything geeky is going to attract the neckbeards/useless people like the above. We’re sorry. I’m kind of a nerd. I like Dr. Who because it’s kind of campy, inventive, ridiculous fun. I try to avoid quoting it whenever possible. Nerds with nothing else going on will be pathetic about literally anything good. If you just watch the show for what it’s worth and ignore other people, then you might enjoy it (or not). Give it a shot, if you want.

  13. Mangosta says

    As big a fan of Doctor Who as I am (if I have triplets I intend to call them Rose, Sarah-Jane and Davros), every comment on here so far proves the article right.
    I especially like the ones saying ‘just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean that you should tell everyone’. My sonic screwdriver’s irony meter just went off the scale.

  14. Philippe says

    Well, that’s pretty harsh isn’t it?

    If I might ask, is it solely the Whovian fandom?

    For a lot of the problems you tell about here are rather similar between many fandoms (Glee and Game of Thrones are things I’m turned off from watching, purely because of fandoms.) However, this does not mean that I am against Glee or GoT, or that I hate their fans with a passion. I’ll just ignore it when it floats around my wall, and politely try to change topic if it comes up in conversations. I like Doctor Who, and so got in a couple faebookgroups centered around that. Which is fun, because if you fanboy there, only other fanboys see it. :p

    So yeah, I’d don’t know what ticks you off of Dr Who fans, so much more then other fandoms, and I’d suggest turning of the hashtag on tumblr (if such a thing is possible) and irl just say you don’t want to talk about that (again).

    One thing more, wanting to punch hair, and hating someone, just because their haircut is (admittedly) odd, makes you sound really immature, and kinda detracts from an in se valid point (namely that fans tend to be much more obsessive then should be healthy). It’s a pity that an in se valid point get drowned out, because of you’re aggressiveness against: 1 specific fandom, 2 plainly insulting and generalising obnoxiousness of you (hating someone because they know the phrase timey-winey? Really?) and 3 arguments that do nothing but insulting persons, without ever giving a reason.

    It is perfectly possible not to like Doctor Who, it’s not like it’s going to be everybodies taste. It speaks to a certain public, in the same way that Harry Potter or Bold and Beautifull have their range of persons who would like reading/seeing that.

    That said, on the bright side of the whovian fandom; we do not consider rape to be something that people should enjoy reading about and should find a good way of action, as opposed to some quite popular other books *cough* 50 shades of grey *cough*. So while we might get attached to recurring characters (and really, a lot of people sometimes cry during movies, let alone characters which you’ve been liking for several years), we at least have an idea about what is and what is not appropiate stuff to do (or so I like to tell myself, and hope that other people do that as well).

    So yeah, would have been a good point in general, but presented in an intrinstically enraging manner, and overly specific. Rather a pity, for this article could have so much more potential, if presented from a more mature point of view.

  15. Kaitlin says

    You are ignorant. You have a personal vendetta against a FICTIONAL TELEVISION SHOW that will probably outlive all of us. Like it or not, I don’t think it is going anywhere. So you, my narrow-minded opponent, are stuck.

    Better hop in that TARDIS and fly to somewhere Doctor Who isn’t relevant… Oh, wait….

    Allonsy!

  16. Dr. David Tennant says

    Hahahahaha well done. Seriously, well done. I have a doctor who link on my Google news (which tells you which side of this “argument” I chime in on) and this article popped up on it, so of course I was intrigued. I read it, and whatever your reasons were for “hating” doctor who fans, be they good, bad or ugly, I must say you are sure to not only hook in a huge fan base with this article to now read your articles, but probably who will now visit the site as a whole a lot more as well. I absolutely approve. Allons-y!

  17. Terry Lightfoot says

    I think that maybe what you are really hating is a certain demographic, of fans. Possibly age related. Not Doctor Who.
    Yes, SOME fans are fanatical. Thus the word fan. Also, the behavior you are describing, for the most part is exhibited by the younger type of fan. And dare I guess, mostly young and female. They get excited. They get carried away by the fantasy of the show. This is natural for that group. They want to blur the edges of the fantasy with reality.
    Most of the adult fans I interact with love the show, can be even fanatical, but we’re also annoyed by young fans that dream of some mythical romantic story where they have a love story going on with the main character. These fans can’t make fun of the show or themselves because it’s all too precious. Whatever. That just takes half the fun out of being a fan. For me Doctor Who is about intellect and romance(as Craig Ferguson puts it) but also about humor and having fun.

    But you know what? It’s ok that some fans behave so fanatically. It’s an aspect of human nature that you’ll just have to get over because it doesn’t just happen in Doctor Who fandom. It happens in ALL fandom. You need to learn a little more tolerance. Why in the world are you cruising those types of tumblrs anyway if you don’t want to see that? I LOVE Doctor who, as in for around 30 years now, but even I don’t frequent certain tumblrs. So why are you?

  18. Blake says

    Don’t like this article!? DON’T READ IT.

    See? That sort of reductive reasoning doesn’t make much sense.

  19. Blake says

    people who don’t read the articles and think that they’re solely about the show rather than the fans who are obnoxious (and not all of the fans, obviously) and then comment on said articles need to shut up or at least write some sort of compelling argument so that there can be an open debate on this issue

  20. Blake says

    Dude, I know Daniel (well, I follow him on Twitter) and he won’t shut up about getting laid. I wish he’d stop getting laid. Maybe then he could close himself off from the world of getting laid and become a Doctor Who fan.

  21. Blake says

    A lot of people I know who watch it enjoy it with the same passion as these ‘ahahajlajlg fans’ but have the social skills necessary to interact with others like human beings.
    As for me, I’m fine with the Old Doctors, and with David Tennant. He’s a good actor, and I’ve enjoyed everything he does. But I think Daniel pointed out the one thing that’s really wrong with the show right now: Matt Smith.

  22. Blake says

    He might not, but I do! I’m sure I hate loads more stuff than Daniel. He like Pittbull, for god’s sake!

  23. JustAnotherWhovian says

    Things I hate:
    1. People who apparently are unable to complete a thought without just randomly hitting keys.
    2. People who rant and rave about a topic they may or may not know about just to garner reviewers.

    Ok so this list is not complete, however, these are the points I wanted to point out first and the only thing that was relevant to your blog post. (Calling it an article is just plain ridiculous)

    Without fans that you described, shows wouldn’t be brought back after cancellation. Jericho sent peanuts, and were rewarded with at least some SORT of ending. I have never seen an episode of Arrested Development, but apparently their fans worked long and hard enough that there will be some sort of pay off in their futures.

    You go on to say that you are a Star Trek fan (without ever stating it in sentence structure that simple). So, regardless that you may have never had a rant in your mom’s basement about how unfair it was that “insert character here” didn’t get “whatever”, I feel that the rants you had were just not broadcast via Tumblr, or twitter, or facebook.

    Fact is with the internet so available now days, with people so able now days to voice their opinion, you will find this in most fandoms.

    As far as the Daleks go, they are an inevitable evil that has remained from the original who days (that started around 50 years ago). Yes they look like a salt shaker, with a household plunger and an egg beater. But for the life of me, after seeing what is inside a dalek, after watching Davros you find yourself MORE afraid of them.

    Every science fiction show relies on an air of disbelief, Whovians have a bit more imagination. Smith’s doctor is finally growing into his character it took a bit longer than others to get there. And if you really want to know who he is the most like in the history of the series, pick up a few Tom Baker episodes and watch those, he was completely silly.

    So in closing, bow ties are cool, Fez’s no matter how much the Doctor wants to be, are not, and River Song is a bad ass. The evils in the show range from Buffy the Vampire ‘scary’ to actually freaking scary. And no, the angels in the mid-season finale weren’t as scary as they were in Blink, but they served their purpose.

    To the fans that are so overzealous that they can’t understand why the Doctor can’t just go grab Rory and Amy, well, it’s explained in the episode, go back and watch.

  24. The Flying Flapjack says

    “As big a fan of Doctor Who as I am (if I have triplets I intend to call them Rose, Sarah-Jane and Davros), every comment on here so far proves the article right.
    I especially like the ones saying ‘just because you have an opinion doesn’t mean that you should tell everyone’. My sonic screwdriver’s irony meter just went off the scale.”

    Magnosta just said everything I was about to say. The writer wasn’t insulting Dr Who or most of the fanbase, just the extremely obnoxious fans who ruin it for everyone else. I am guessing that some Whovians either just read the title and jumped straight to the comments to vent their butthurt fury (and didn’t let a silly thing like the REST OF THE ARTICLE get in the way of their pity party hissy fit), or maybe the article just hit a bit too close to home.

  25. jayy says

    You know, I have that sonic screwdriver. You’re exactly the type of person I’d never hang out with.

  26. lemonlime says

    Uh…nope. He doesn’t hate Doctor Who. And he only hates annoying doctor who fans. I…really don’t think he ever said that he hated tumblr, fangirls, or every other living being.

  27. Amused says

    Imagine being at a dinner that you find decent, with a person that chews with their mouth open. When you point out that what they’re doing is obnoxious and rude they say it’s not their fault you’re annoyed, you just hate food.

    That’s what it was like reading this article then reading the comments. A whole lot of completely missing the obvious point. It gives me a cruel chuckle.

  28. AppleJuice says

    Good lord. THANK YOU.
    I was verbally assaulted on multiple occasions for not being into Dr. Who.
    The fans are absolutely disgusting. I can’t believe all of the butthurt in the comments.

  29. AppleJuice says

    Did you actually read this? Because the author clearly stated it was directed toward OBNOXIOUS fans.

  30. Clair says

    WHy am I reading this? I’m on a panel about why people who hate Doctor Who keep watching the bloody show and bitch about it. Thanks for the material.

  31. Poppy says

    This could have been stated in a bit less insulting way, but I agree. It does reveal a lot of character. Besides, from reading a few things you can’t get the humor from the show. I’m also assuming you’ve (OP) seen the old ones, which were much cheesier, and didn’t have nearly the quality of the special effects now. Now, every episode you watch, the plot gets better, and it just warms your heart. The doctor is just so freaking awesome, just don’t have any choice but to be obsessed with the show once you watch enough of it. Also,that’s a very bad pic of mat. Here http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/31600000/Matt-Smith-matt-smith-31605128-500-500.jpg

  32. Poppy says

    Allon-sy* Not a person. It’s french for “let’s go” and it’s a phrase used by the doctor. whooooovian stuff. Just another thing that brings our awesome community together :3

  33. Cordial says

    At what point in recent history did everyone become obsessed with the idea that all opinions are equal and that they all deserve respect?

  34. nina ruth says

    Thank you!! I think it’s a campy, ridiculous show, and add such, I would enjoy it, the same way I enjoy Mystery Science Theater…but too many fans, including friends, are so lame about it, that it ruins it for me!!

  35. IZHEVSK says

    This show along with Supernatural and Sherlock make Tumblr a fucking shithole. Fuck fandoms.

  36. Vicky says

    Doctor Who is a popular show, just as most “fandoms” are.
    One Direction is bringing fake fans into this group.
    In the U.S.A people are obsessed with Great Britain.
    In my opinion being Welsh, i find is NOTHING to go barmy about.
    I feel very embarrassed that they are from my country.
    Please think about other fandoms that are much more annoying.
    Whatever though. I guess its not that important..

  37. Dullahan the Irish Man says

    Not against the show, it’s retarded fans. Not all fans. Just the retarded ones.

  38. Morris says

    I couldn’t agree with this any more. Tumblr, Dr. Who, annoying GIF’s, the doctor’s hair… you hit it on the head!

  39. Will Friesen says

    Dang, son. I’m truly jealous I hadn’t written this article, it’s everything I’ve wanted to say. You failed to mention the thousands of episodes, and how each one needs to be watched to even remotely make sense, but that’s okay. Sure, there are tons of crappy shows, but they don’t shove themselves down my throat; Merlin has never given me lung cancer, despite being equally terrible.

  40. Kc says

    I stopped watching dr who when I saw some blonde girl being chased by mannequins in a mall basement. It saddens me that adults watch this show!

  41. Lame pun says

    I was going to leave this alone but couldnt. Listen, Im one of those fans and Im not going to bash you for not liking the show or hating me, in fact I want to say Im sorry. LISTEN: WE DONT MEAN TO ANNOY YOU! Us fans dont wake up and think “oh joy, who am i going to annoy to death today” We dont, honest. But we love the show, and other people like it too, so we share the love. I dont hate you. You can hate me, its fine. Can I give some advice? Dont make fun of people for being passionate! annoying included

  42. MT says

    I am a fan. But gawd some fans are annoying as hell. Like it’s okay to pick favorites of who’s your favorite Doctor but telling others that it should always be Tom Baker because he’s just great and then they criticize when someone choose Tennant. WHAT. I’m done with this fandom but I’ll still watch Doctor Who. It’s just some purists fans who can’t take an episode of the New Doctor Who are crazy. The classics are great and I’ve seen Baker – Davison era which has some of the great stories but don’t start bitching about the new Doctor Who coz this show is built on to be constantly changing. Ugh.

  43. Silvana says

    I also hate doctor Who just for the fans…I never watched the show, but just by read how many obnoxious people like it, I lost the motivation for see it….

    Another confession…I hate all the Star wars saga, and I never say it in public because is a sort of blaspheme. I’m also a woman and I deeply hate Han Solo…is like, YOU are a woman, you don´t like this FANTASTIC SHOW/MOVIE/CHARACTER ergo you are automatically stupid!!!!

    I add to my black list My little Pony, Game of trones, Futurama, The Hunger Games and Lady Gaga…we are the internet heretics.

  44. DAvid says

    Hahaha oh many I completely agree with this article on so many levels . Really reminds me of this geek that loveees this show. Her vindication for this show just puts me off . Not to mention she’s one of those comicon freaks . Thanks for yet again another wonderful piece of writing ! Makes me smile :)

  45. J0hnnyF00tball says

    Thank you! This show sucks hard and the fanboys are the worst thing on the internet right now. But, the butthurt commentariat has absolutely proven the entire article.

  46. Chren says

    It’s fine that you don’t like Doctor Who fans but you’re overreacting.

    Most of your statements are exaggerated.

    Like, if you don’t like his fucking hair, then try to avoid fucking looking at it or something? How the hell can hair upset someone this much?

    Stop focusing on the HAIR and focus more on the SHOW and the FANS.

  47. Chren says

    It’s your own fault, you’re missing a lot of great shows. (Doctor Who, Game of Thrones, Futurame…)

    You shouldn’t let some stupid fans decide if you’re going to watch it or not.

    Hey, you’re missing a lot, but as we say on the internet:

    “Whatever floats your boat”.

  48. Kale says

    Depending on what you mean by constructive. I see it as destructive to the rights behind freedom of expression. tsk tsk.

  49. DeathToTheDoctor says

    I just typed, “I Hate Doctor Who,” and came across this article.

    And it is by far the most satisfying thing I’ve read all day. XD

    HELL YES!!! I’m tired of the quirky, groan inducing humor. I’m tired of the stupidity of the plots, and villains. I’m tired of the fans who think they’re the most charming, witty people who ever lived.

    I AM TIRED OF DR FREAKIN’ WHO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Fuck Dr Who. Fuck it.

  50. asdfkopsdkf says

    I CAN’T STAND ALL THE DOCTOR WHO SHIT ON MY FACEBOOK FEED. I USED TO NOT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE SHOW AND NOW I HATE IT AND I HATE PEOPLE THAT WATCH IT, YOU SOCIALLY RETARDED MORONS

  51. Wtf? says

    No one gives a shit about your opinion, Troll… Get a life and stop insulting people. You have nothing to gain from it.