It's Friday.

And what's the betting you've had a hard week, eh? Don't worry – hecklerspray knows the score. Your muscles are aching, your vision is blurry, your mind is running away with itself and you're generally feeling more than a little under the weather.

You know what you should do? Maybe you should run a nice warm bath, dig out that book you've been meaning to read, take the phone off the hook and spend Saturday and Sunday lazing around the house. Or maybe you should hit the pubs and unwind with a few friends, a few drinks, and some good conversation.

Or maybe – considering how adventurous you're feeling – you may like to increase your sense of wellbeing by accelerating the flow and volume of blood to the brain?

By drilling a hole in your head.

This is apparently a process known as trepanning, and – apart from all that blood-spattered-ripping-apart-bone-and-flesh inconvenience – it's supposed to be a really good way of opening that 'third eye' of yours. Just think – the relaxation you'll feel afterwards will surely be worth the price of stripping away at your brain's natural casing like a frenzied woodwork teacher. 

But wait! Don't – as goshdarn tempting as it may be – go reaching for the Black And Decker just yet. You'd better consult the good people at ITAG – the International Trepanation Advocacy Group. If you're thinking of going ahead with the procedure, we'll strongly suggest talking to them first.

Otherwise… god forbid. You might end up doing something stupid.

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I.T.A.G

Disclaimer: Hecklerspray does not actually advocate drilling a hole into your skull. (And if you do want to do that, at least notify one of your mates … that way, when you kill yourself, they can at least make a few quid from nominating you for the Darwin Awards.)